How Guillermo Drove Me to Drink

Let me set the scene.

Ace and I watch an episode of Mythbusters and decide that if the heat is ever off in the house again, we'll let Guillermo on the bed with us to help keep all of us warm. Of course, this conversation is said out loud, because we are sitting a few feet from each other and that's how people communicate.

A little while later, while watching an episode of Hogan's Heroes, we notice the dog leaving the living room and heading toward our bedroom for no apparent reason. We call him back into the living room and shrug it off. When he goes back that way in a few minutes, we call him back into the living room and start speculating.

Then, we stop him before he disappears again and I walk into the bed room. I find that he has obviously been getting on the bed which he is not allowed to do (on MY side! where his is really not allowed) and he follows us into the room. The sheets are wet, not all over, but it's obvious that he's drooled on them, and mostly near where my head and body will be tonight (eeewww).

And I am having trouble keeping my composure, because part of me just wants to cry because who wants to end their day with changing the sheets because the dog thought it would be fun to get on the bed? Instead, we get to witness Guillermo jump on the bed yet again and Ace decides to discipline him for it. Then, I finally get a hug and a suggestion that I laugh instead of crying, because it will be better for me. So, in an effort to cheer myself up, I grab the only alcohol in the house and chug down a few drinks (I'm not even feeling tipsy).

And then, I go strip the bed so we can put clean sheets on it. And I demand a 24 hour period in which the dog gets no people food as punishment. His puppy eyes do nothing to my frustration and the sentence stands.