It's December, which means it's getting closer to Christmas. In the spirit of sharing, I am going to share 15 random things about me that are related to Christmas. Because I like to challenge myself, apparently.
1. I like any type of Christmas song, as opposed to the rest of the year when I seem to almost single mindedly listen to country and little else. In fact, the only song I've found I don't like is Madonna's version of Santa Baby. Give me Eartha Kitt over Madonna any day.
2. My favorite Christmas special is Frosty the Snowman. I have no idea why, but it's the one I like the most.
3. It doesn't feel like Christmas time until I've heard "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas". The morning radio show I spent most of my teenage years listening to played it every December. (One of my cousins once asked for a hippopotamus for Christmas, but she was happy for it to be a stuffed one. We found one.)
4. I know all the words to the B.C. Clark jingle. It's a jewelry store in Oklahoma City, and they have their own Christmas/anniversary jingle. I've never been to one of their stores.
5. I will happily spend a month watching TV specials I've seen 20+ times before. I'm kind of sad that I've not gotten to do that the past few years.
6. While I could easily listen to Christmas music almost non-stop (with enough variety), I understand that it would drive my husband crazy, so I only listen as reasonably possible.
7. Even though I haven't believed in Santa bringing me gifts since I was 10, I still find myself believing in Santa during the holiday specials.
8. I would love to have a white Christmas.
9. I love picking out gifts for people. I hate not knowing what people would like.
10. When I have a tree, it will be covered in a fairly eclectic mix of ornaments. I've already started looking up ornaments online to find ones I like.
11. I prefer the multi-color lights to the plain white ones. Christmas lights should be colorful, in my opinion. (Although, I have seen some lovely houses that just used white lights for decorating.)
12. While I believe that Christmas doesn't start until after Thanksgiving, I'd prefer to wait another week or two after that to put up a tree.
13. Last year, Ace and I gifted ourselves with a GPS for our truck. It's been one of the best investments we've made.
14. Last year was the first time Ace and I were apart on Christmas since we got married.
15. I'm not sure what our plans are for this Christmas, but it's looking likely that we'll be on the road.
Well, that ended up kind of maudlin. I apologize for that.
Monday, December 2, 2013
Thursday, November 21, 2013
Depression Doesn't Care About That
I have talked, briefly, in the past about my depression. I have mostly, in my own opinion, whined about feeling depressed and upset and sad. Trust me when I say, I hate talking about depression as much as I hate having depression.
However, I've never really talked about depression as just the disease of depression. Because it is a disease, and not just because it's in a big medical text book about mental health diseases. After all, homosexuality used to be in that big book. No, depression is a disease because we know at least some of the causes (mostly chemical imbalances in the brain).
Not that that is what I want to talk about either.
I want to talk about the fact that depression doesn't care about race, sexuality, gender, or any other factor when deciding who to affect. It doesn't care about your politics, who you went to school with, or what your favorite color is. How things are going in your life can affect whether or not you have a depressive episode (it sounds like a TV show when I say that... if only it could be fixed in 30 minutes or less with a nice warm hug at the end and never return again). My worst bout of depression happened last year when Ace was on a truck and I was stuck living with his parents and feeling helpless about most things. And it was bad enough that I stopped eating almost entirely and barely functioned as a human being.
Before you say that I was just a whiny girl, keep in mind that I wanted to care about at least some of normal, regular, everyday things. But I just couldn't because it took all I had some days just to get out from under the covers, get dressed, and grab food that was sitting three steps away. I never wanted to hurt myself, I just couldn't seem to take care of myself either.
Depression didn't care that I was only a few months away from spending almost 24-7 with Ace again. Depression didn't care that I was finally starting to be more financially stable. Depression didn't care that my life wasn't truly getting worse (except the parts where my father-in-law was trying to sexually harass me, claiming it was to show me love, but that is a totally different topic). Depression didn't care about any of that. It just wanted to suck me down into it's seedy undertow.
And there have been times that just something less than good happening on some random day that depression has tried to suck me into it's midst. And while you might feel like that's me being somewhat entitled and stuck up, it's been about stupid things that have only minorly inconvenienced us. Things that didn't matter in the long run. Because depression didn't care that it was stupid and annoying more than anything else. It had found a foothold and wanted to drag me down.
If you ever have someone you care about tell you that they are depressed, please don't tell them to get over it. Please don't act like they can just choose to become happy again. Tell them that you care and you want to do anything you can to help. Tell them that it's good that they got out of bed and got dressed, because those things can be big accomplishments when you are depressed. Tell them that you are willing to listen or help them find professional help. Be willing to listen and help them find professional help. And for God's sake, don't act like it's not important that they are hurting and needing help. Don't treat their statements as light. If they are telling you, they feel safe with you and they want to confide in you and probably get help. If they tell you they've thought about hurting themselves or committing suicide, take them seriously. Help them help themselves and be willing to help them get serious help. Because it is a cry for help.
I considered asking for help last year. I knew that what I was feeling and how I was living was not healthy, but I didn't have anyone I trusted around me to help. Despite that, I did get better. Mostly because Ace got to take some time off and that helped tremendously. I had something to do each week that helped me focus on other people and that helped. But it was not the way I wanted to get better. I deserved better and so does everyone else who is hurting. Because those commercials about depression meds are right about one thing; depression hurts. And it hurts others to see the effects of depression on someone they love (at least it seems to hurt Ace when I'm hurting).
If you are depressed, please remember that it does get better. Sometimes it needs help, but it does get better. If someone you care about is depressed, please help them through until it gets better. Sometimes, that some of the help that is needed.
And no matter what, don't tell someone to just get over it. That never works.
However, I've never really talked about depression as just the disease of depression. Because it is a disease, and not just because it's in a big medical text book about mental health diseases. After all, homosexuality used to be in that big book. No, depression is a disease because we know at least some of the causes (mostly chemical imbalances in the brain).
Not that that is what I want to talk about either.
I want to talk about the fact that depression doesn't care about race, sexuality, gender, or any other factor when deciding who to affect. It doesn't care about your politics, who you went to school with, or what your favorite color is. How things are going in your life can affect whether or not you have a depressive episode (it sounds like a TV show when I say that... if only it could be fixed in 30 minutes or less with a nice warm hug at the end and never return again). My worst bout of depression happened last year when Ace was on a truck and I was stuck living with his parents and feeling helpless about most things. And it was bad enough that I stopped eating almost entirely and barely functioned as a human being.
Before you say that I was just a whiny girl, keep in mind that I wanted to care about at least some of normal, regular, everyday things. But I just couldn't because it took all I had some days just to get out from under the covers, get dressed, and grab food that was sitting three steps away. I never wanted to hurt myself, I just couldn't seem to take care of myself either.
Depression didn't care that I was only a few months away from spending almost 24-7 with Ace again. Depression didn't care that I was finally starting to be more financially stable. Depression didn't care that my life wasn't truly getting worse (except the parts where my father-in-law was trying to sexually harass me, claiming it was to show me love, but that is a totally different topic). Depression didn't care about any of that. It just wanted to suck me down into it's seedy undertow.
And there have been times that just something less than good happening on some random day that depression has tried to suck me into it's midst. And while you might feel like that's me being somewhat entitled and stuck up, it's been about stupid things that have only minorly inconvenienced us. Things that didn't matter in the long run. Because depression didn't care that it was stupid and annoying more than anything else. It had found a foothold and wanted to drag me down.
If you ever have someone you care about tell you that they are depressed, please don't tell them to get over it. Please don't act like they can just choose to become happy again. Tell them that you care and you want to do anything you can to help. Tell them that it's good that they got out of bed and got dressed, because those things can be big accomplishments when you are depressed. Tell them that you are willing to listen or help them find professional help. Be willing to listen and help them find professional help. And for God's sake, don't act like it's not important that they are hurting and needing help. Don't treat their statements as light. If they are telling you, they feel safe with you and they want to confide in you and probably get help. If they tell you they've thought about hurting themselves or committing suicide, take them seriously. Help them help themselves and be willing to help them get serious help. Because it is a cry for help.
I considered asking for help last year. I knew that what I was feeling and how I was living was not healthy, but I didn't have anyone I trusted around me to help. Despite that, I did get better. Mostly because Ace got to take some time off and that helped tremendously. I had something to do each week that helped me focus on other people and that helped. But it was not the way I wanted to get better. I deserved better and so does everyone else who is hurting. Because those commercials about depression meds are right about one thing; depression hurts. And it hurts others to see the effects of depression on someone they love (at least it seems to hurt Ace when I'm hurting).
If you are depressed, please remember that it does get better. Sometimes it needs help, but it does get better. If someone you care about is depressed, please help them through until it gets better. Sometimes, that some of the help that is needed.
And no matter what, don't tell someone to just get over it. That never works.
Tuesday, November 19, 2013
A Post About Nothing
I feel like I should write and pour my heart out. Only, I really have nothing that needs to be said.
I spent about 48 hoursterrified concerned that I might be pregnant, because as much as I want kids now is so not the time for a pregnancy. And then I started spotting and now I feel like I can breathe again (don't tell me that until I actually start my period there is no breathing room, I know this, but I feel better knowing my body is doing something it's supposed to do right now even if it could mean something else.).
Hormones had me feeling nauseous more often that I like. And peppermints were helping, but bumps were making it worse. And there are a ton of bumps on the road.
Things are going well with the new company. We're keeping ourselves as put together as we can and it's been less stressful.
I have discovered which company makes condiments for McDonald's. That's kind of cool.
Yeah... I've got nothing right now.
I spent about 48 hours
Hormones had me feeling nauseous more often that I like. And peppermints were helping, but bumps were making it worse. And there are a ton of bumps on the road.
Things are going well with the new company. We're keeping ourselves as put together as we can and it's been less stressful.
I have discovered which company makes condiments for McDonald's. That's kind of cool.
Yeah... I've got nothing right now.
Sunday, November 17, 2013
Another Letter to an Unnamed Trucking Company
Dear Unnamed Trucking Company,
I'm sure you are wondering why Ace left you. Not that any one there except his driving manager seemed to try to really talk him into staying. And that is part of the problem. No one cared.
We even had one guy tell Ace that no one would care at any other company, so he might as well stay with you. That was a bad reasoning on why someone should stay at a company.
Someone else gave some excuse for how he wouldn't be stuck for the better part of a week starting in January. This was in September, so it wasn't a good excuse and the company he was switching to would have the same benefits under the proposed California law. This just made us confused about why that would be a reason to stay.
It doesn't help matters that Ace got stuck in California twice in a month. Nor did it help that no one apparently noticed that his info said that he doesn't drive in New York City. Or that before the second time we got stuck in California he had already declined 2 other chances to go to California that same day (really, why were you all so hot for him to go back to California?).
Your planners apparently decided to stop planning ahead and sending us info for the next load to pick up before we delivered, which was costing us lots of money each week. And left us sitting around more often than not.
His new company did send him to California on his first trip with them. And then gave him a trip right back out of California right afterwards. With no waiting and wondering what the next trip would be. In fact, we've had very little just sitting around between trips, and each time there was a logical reason for why we were waiting (once is because we were having work done on the truck... and we had our next load before it was done being worked on).
Working with people up at your company was stressful. Ace and I hadn't been off the truck since July 1st, but you were not willing to help with a hotel room when it became apparent that quitting the company was going to take until the next day (because the truck wasn't needing work that would keep us off the truck, apparently). The new company rented us a car and had a hotel room paid for us to stay in from Saturday until Wednesday (we paid for 2 days because we got there on Thursday). Quitting cost us way too much money, but we'll happily make more (even if I'm not driving yet) with the new company. So far, there has been no stress when talking with anyone at the new company.
Basically, your company sucks and that is why Ace quit. We miss the size and some of the storage options of your truck, but that's it.
Much less stressed,
M.A. Smith
I'm sure you are wondering why Ace left you. Not that any one there except his driving manager seemed to try to really talk him into staying. And that is part of the problem. No one cared.
We even had one guy tell Ace that no one would care at any other company, so he might as well stay with you. That was a bad reasoning on why someone should stay at a company.
Someone else gave some excuse for how he wouldn't be stuck for the better part of a week starting in January. This was in September, so it wasn't a good excuse and the company he was switching to would have the same benefits under the proposed California law. This just made us confused about why that would be a reason to stay.
It doesn't help matters that Ace got stuck in California twice in a month. Nor did it help that no one apparently noticed that his info said that he doesn't drive in New York City. Or that before the second time we got stuck in California he had already declined 2 other chances to go to California that same day (really, why were you all so hot for him to go back to California?).
Your planners apparently decided to stop planning ahead and sending us info for the next load to pick up before we delivered, which was costing us lots of money each week. And left us sitting around more often than not.
His new company did send him to California on his first trip with them. And then gave him a trip right back out of California right afterwards. With no waiting and wondering what the next trip would be. In fact, we've had very little just sitting around between trips, and each time there was a logical reason for why we were waiting (once is because we were having work done on the truck... and we had our next load before it was done being worked on).
Working with people up at your company was stressful. Ace and I hadn't been off the truck since July 1st, but you were not willing to help with a hotel room when it became apparent that quitting the company was going to take until the next day (because the truck wasn't needing work that would keep us off the truck, apparently). The new company rented us a car and had a hotel room paid for us to stay in from Saturday until Wednesday (we paid for 2 days because we got there on Thursday). Quitting cost us way too much money, but we'll happily make more (even if I'm not driving yet) with the new company. So far, there has been no stress when talking with anyone at the new company.
Basically, your company sucks and that is why Ace quit. We miss the size and some of the storage options of your truck, but that's it.
Much less stressed,
M.A. Smith
I'm Not So Superficial (Any More)
I kind of understand why we judge people, in general, on stupid surface things like looks, what music they listen to, what clothes they wear, what kind of car they drive, what their occupation is. It's a quick way to start sorting out whether or not we'd be friends.
But it drives me crazy. The people I've found with the biggest hearts and that I care about the most are the people I know little to nothing about most of those things. I, obviously, can know what they look like and what they wear, but I may not know much else. And none of that really matters to me.
Having money to buy expensive clothes or cars does not mean you have a heart that cares for others. Wearing jeans and a t-shirt and driving a car that looks like it needs a paint job does not mean that you don't care about anyone. Sometimes it just means that you've had some hard times and this is what you have right now.
When I was in 4th-6th grades, I had some fairly close friends that weren't popular. Sadly, I lost touch with them after 6th grade, so I have no idea where they are now, but they were better friends to me than I probably deserved. I loved them with all my heart, except when I got asked why I was friends with them by the popular kids. And then I was a bad friend and dropped them like a hot potato. And they kept forgiving me and taking me back when I pulled my head out of wherever I had stuck it and went back to actually being friends with my friends (usually within a few days). I feel terrible about it now. At the time, I just wanted to maybe be popular (because I was kind of stupid about what being popular meant).
But I had gravitated toward people with big hearts and lots of love and forgiveness for someone who was kind of stupid despite being so smart. People who believed in me and were fun to be around. And that shaped me, even when I was being stupid.
So now, I don't really focus much on what people wear, or what they drive, or what their favorite things are. At least not for judging if they would be good friends. Because I had friends that looked past any of that while I was learning that people who care about you are worth far more than people that sort of like you. Because I'd rather judge my friends by the content of their hearts than their interests. Because I can find people who are amazing and who bless my life by being in it without needing to share interests in tv or movies.
Part of that lesson came when in 7th or 8th grade I had a "friend" who one day just decided that she didn't like me any more. And then a few days later, she liked me again. But I was shut out of most of my group of friends because one girl didn't like me for no apparent reason. And I think it helped me realize what a bad friend I had been in the past. I gave that friend a second chance, but the friendship wasn't as close and when she decided that she didn't like me for no apparent reason again, I just gave up on the friendship. Not quite as forgiving as my friends a few years earlier had been (the time frame on my random self-conscious idiocy was closer to once a year, not twice in as many months, which probably helped them too). But I had already started figuring out who were the type of people that would care about me vs caring about themselves.
So, now a days, I try to not judge someone by superficial means. I am by no means perfect, but I'm getting better at it.
I hope to teach my children this without them having to go through what I did. I'd prefer their stupid decisions to be about something less likely to hurt people, especially the ones who truly care about them.
And to those friends, I apologize. I'm not sure I did that adequately when we were younger. You deserved someone being your friend who didn't randomly get ashamed about superficial things. I wish I had done better at that. Thank you so much for being willing to forgive me. I got better, but I never forgot that I was that person. I hope you found better friends as you grew up. Ones that didn't do what I did. Ones who loved you because of who you were and are. Ones who wanted good things for you. Thank you for believing in me enough to forgive me.
But it drives me crazy. The people I've found with the biggest hearts and that I care about the most are the people I know little to nothing about most of those things. I, obviously, can know what they look like and what they wear, but I may not know much else. And none of that really matters to me.
Having money to buy expensive clothes or cars does not mean you have a heart that cares for others. Wearing jeans and a t-shirt and driving a car that looks like it needs a paint job does not mean that you don't care about anyone. Sometimes it just means that you've had some hard times and this is what you have right now.
When I was in 4th-6th grades, I had some fairly close friends that weren't popular. Sadly, I lost touch with them after 6th grade, so I have no idea where they are now, but they were better friends to me than I probably deserved. I loved them with all my heart, except when I got asked why I was friends with them by the popular kids. And then I was a bad friend and dropped them like a hot potato. And they kept forgiving me and taking me back when I pulled my head out of wherever I had stuck it and went back to actually being friends with my friends (usually within a few days). I feel terrible about it now. At the time, I just wanted to maybe be popular (because I was kind of stupid about what being popular meant).
But I had gravitated toward people with big hearts and lots of love and forgiveness for someone who was kind of stupid despite being so smart. People who believed in me and were fun to be around. And that shaped me, even when I was being stupid.
So now, I don't really focus much on what people wear, or what they drive, or what their favorite things are. At least not for judging if they would be good friends. Because I had friends that looked past any of that while I was learning that people who care about you are worth far more than people that sort of like you. Because I'd rather judge my friends by the content of their hearts than their interests. Because I can find people who are amazing and who bless my life by being in it without needing to share interests in tv or movies.
Part of that lesson came when in 7th or 8th grade I had a "friend" who one day just decided that she didn't like me any more. And then a few days later, she liked me again. But I was shut out of most of my group of friends because one girl didn't like me for no apparent reason. And I think it helped me realize what a bad friend I had been in the past. I gave that friend a second chance, but the friendship wasn't as close and when she decided that she didn't like me for no apparent reason again, I just gave up on the friendship. Not quite as forgiving as my friends a few years earlier had been (the time frame on my random self-conscious idiocy was closer to once a year, not twice in as many months, which probably helped them too). But I had already started figuring out who were the type of people that would care about me vs caring about themselves.
So, now a days, I try to not judge someone by superficial means. I am by no means perfect, but I'm getting better at it.
I hope to teach my children this without them having to go through what I did. I'd prefer their stupid decisions to be about something less likely to hurt people, especially the ones who truly care about them.
And to those friends, I apologize. I'm not sure I did that adequately when we were younger. You deserved someone being your friend who didn't randomly get ashamed about superficial things. I wish I had done better at that. Thank you so much for being willing to forgive me. I got better, but I never forgot that I was that person. I hope you found better friends as you grew up. Ones that didn't do what I did. Ones who loved you because of who you were and are. Ones who wanted good things for you. Thank you for believing in me enough to forgive me.
Friday, November 1, 2013
Change Has Come
So, this year I am not doing NaBloPoMo. I have been doing badly about updating this blog, and I doubt that I'd do better by pushing myself to post every day for a month.
Instead, I am going to try to post more often than every two weeks. I make no promises.
Ace has switched companies, something that he had been considering since June. Things are changing. Today we are starting our first trip with the new company. Later, I will probably write a letter on here to the old company explaining why we left. I have feelings about it and I need to vent them. I'm still not naming companies though.
I am surprised to find that I am getting twitchy about having sat still for so long. I'm not used to us not going somewhere, and while I know that eventually we'll be out of over the road truck driving, that time has not come yet. I'll probably feel twitchy then too, until I get busy.
In the mean time, I have things to do (like bags to unpack and get things settled into semi-permanent places as they seem fit to do so. And I've got to try to leave some open space for the stuff we have yet to put on our truck, but will need.
Life is fun and exciting, except it's not anything I want to write about because it's involved and probably somewhat boring to most people.
Life is changing. And right now, that is good.
Instead, I am going to try to post more often than every two weeks. I make no promises.
Ace has switched companies, something that he had been considering since June. Things are changing. Today we are starting our first trip with the new company. Later, I will probably write a letter on here to the old company explaining why we left. I have feelings about it and I need to vent them. I'm still not naming companies though.
I am surprised to find that I am getting twitchy about having sat still for so long. I'm not used to us not going somewhere, and while I know that eventually we'll be out of over the road truck driving, that time has not come yet. I'll probably feel twitchy then too, until I get busy.
In the mean time, I have things to do (like bags to unpack and get things settled into semi-permanent places as they seem fit to do so. And I've got to try to leave some open space for the stuff we have yet to put on our truck, but will need.
Life is fun and exciting, except it's not anything I want to write about because it's involved and probably somewhat boring to most people.
Life is changing. And right now, that is good.
Friday, October 18, 2013
Things You Should Know Before Getting on a Semi
Life on the road is... different. There are things that you should know before you even contemplate doing it.
1. If you are on a truck with someone, you can't really get away from them. The best you can get is being on the other side of a curtain or being apart during bathroom breaks (unless you are the same gender, then I don't think that will happen). You are going to have to figure out how not to make the other person want to hurt you and how to deal with the stress of seeing/hearing/being around someone practically 24-7. Ace can't do much that I don't know about. I can't do much that he doesn't know about. We are constantly around each other and there is almost no break from that. If we hadn't already gotten used to it, we'd probably have had some fights by now.
2. If you have an APU (alternate power unit), it helps keep you cooler or warmer. It cannot make you comfortable in 90+ degree weather. It is too hot to handle all of the cooling on it's own. You will have to idle the truck or you will have to stay hot. There are no other options.
3. There are temperatures that are impossible to sleep in. 100+ degrees outside makes it difficult or impossible to sleep soundly inside.
4. People in 4-wheeled vehicles drive like they are nuts. Especially around semis. They cut a big truck off and then slow down. They pass on the right. They slow way down from in front of a truck to get behind it when they are entering the interstate, just to zoom around it afterwards. They have almost no idea how long it takes a truck to stop, how wide the turning radius is, or where a driver's blind spots are. Given the number of crazy people on the road, there is a surprisingly lower number of wrecks involving semis and most of those are not the truck driver's fault.
5. Some companies don't care about their drivers. Some companies do. Some companies are good to start with to get enough experience to get to a company that will treat you right. Be careful who you work for. Talk to truck drivers to find out what they've heard, but take their information with a grain of salt. They have probably mostly heard other drivers complaints if they are talking about a company they have never worked for.
6. Sometimes you will have to stop somewhere you don't want to because you don't have any other options. Hopefully it will be a place that is open 24-7 and has decent bathrooms. Hopefully you will never be yelled at for using a bathroom at a truck stop (if it's one of the chains, they won't yell ever because that's what the bathrooms are for).
7. Playing make-a-space sucks. If you get hit, even if it's not your fault, you could be blamed by your company for not being in a legal space. Sometimes you may not have other options. If you can buy a space, cough up the money instead of making-a-space. It's safer and then you are covered. Plus it's tax deductible.
8. As much as you may hate it, you will eventually have to pee somewhere without a toilet (or one so nasty you don't want to use it). If you are male, use a bottle. If you are female, buy a pitcher with a lid and pour said contents into a bottle. You will probably always have a bottle around, because it is ridiculously easy to find 1 liter drinks at truck stops.
9. Eating out is expensive. The truck does not have any type of kitchen appliances. The two end up being related. You will either buy a microwave and a fridge, or you will constantly overspend on eating out. The microwave/fridge option is probably cheaper in the long run. Heat and eat meals are a lot cheaper at Walmart than at the truck stop.
10. You will not get to shower every day. There are plenty of times you will get to shower. You will probably have plenty of showers that expire before you use them. But after driving for 10+ hours a day, you will usually want to go to sleep. Sometimes, you won't be at a place where you have a shower available because it was the best place to stop for the night. You won't get to shower every day, and that's just a fact of life on the road.
11. Most truck stops have laundry rooms. Most of those laundry rooms are available to the general public. Sometimes the general public will take up all the washers and you will just be pissed off about it. Unfortunately, you can't do much about it but wait to do laundry, either at that stop later or at another stop.
12. Some loads take forever to get loaded. Some loads take forever to get unloaded. You will be stuck waiting at a shipper or receiver at some point. You will get stuck calling like you are obsessed to check on a load. This is especially bad when it's meat being hauled, but Ace and I just waited 2 extra days for a load of gum and life savors (which was still not fully right).
13. Deadlines for delivery (DLDs) are sometimes just given to make you laugh. I know because some shippers treat them as suggestions instead of actual deadlines. All you can do is tell your company and hope that either someone else will be able to swap trailers with you (so the load gets there on time) or that the receiver is willing to change their appointment so that you can get it there on time. If the load is ready by DLD and anything happens, the load is going to be late (unless you can swap trailers).
14. The internet is key to trip planning. Google maps, while not wholly appropriate for trucks, helps give you a good idea on what ways are likely to be good ones to travel. Pay for internet availability. It's not optional.
15. Verizon seems to have the best coverage for phones and internet. You will need a cell phone to contact people at your company. I've already talked about the internet. Most of the big name truck stops have apps for smart phones and there are other services that are useful with apps too. Smart phones are optional, but well worth the money. Plus, then you can play games while waiting to be loaded or unloaded.
This list is by no means exhaustive, but I have some more pressing needs to take care of.
Stay safe and be careful around semis if you are in a 4-wheel vehicle. We'd like you to all stay alive out there.
1. If you are on a truck with someone, you can't really get away from them. The best you can get is being on the other side of a curtain or being apart during bathroom breaks (unless you are the same gender, then I don't think that will happen). You are going to have to figure out how not to make the other person want to hurt you and how to deal with the stress of seeing/hearing/being around someone practically 24-7. Ace can't do much that I don't know about. I can't do much that he doesn't know about. We are constantly around each other and there is almost no break from that. If we hadn't already gotten used to it, we'd probably have had some fights by now.
2. If you have an APU (alternate power unit), it helps keep you cooler or warmer. It cannot make you comfortable in 90+ degree weather. It is too hot to handle all of the cooling on it's own. You will have to idle the truck or you will have to stay hot. There are no other options.
3. There are temperatures that are impossible to sleep in. 100+ degrees outside makes it difficult or impossible to sleep soundly inside.
4. People in 4-wheeled vehicles drive like they are nuts. Especially around semis. They cut a big truck off and then slow down. They pass on the right. They slow way down from in front of a truck to get behind it when they are entering the interstate, just to zoom around it afterwards. They have almost no idea how long it takes a truck to stop, how wide the turning radius is, or where a driver's blind spots are. Given the number of crazy people on the road, there is a surprisingly lower number of wrecks involving semis and most of those are not the truck driver's fault.
5. Some companies don't care about their drivers. Some companies do. Some companies are good to start with to get enough experience to get to a company that will treat you right. Be careful who you work for. Talk to truck drivers to find out what they've heard, but take their information with a grain of salt. They have probably mostly heard other drivers complaints if they are talking about a company they have never worked for.
6. Sometimes you will have to stop somewhere you don't want to because you don't have any other options. Hopefully it will be a place that is open 24-7 and has decent bathrooms. Hopefully you will never be yelled at for using a bathroom at a truck stop (if it's one of the chains, they won't yell ever because that's what the bathrooms are for).
7. Playing make-a-space sucks. If you get hit, even if it's not your fault, you could be blamed by your company for not being in a legal space. Sometimes you may not have other options. If you can buy a space, cough up the money instead of making-a-space. It's safer and then you are covered. Plus it's tax deductible.
8. As much as you may hate it, you will eventually have to pee somewhere without a toilet (or one so nasty you don't want to use it). If you are male, use a bottle. If you are female, buy a pitcher with a lid and pour said contents into a bottle. You will probably always have a bottle around, because it is ridiculously easy to find 1 liter drinks at truck stops.
9. Eating out is expensive. The truck does not have any type of kitchen appliances. The two end up being related. You will either buy a microwave and a fridge, or you will constantly overspend on eating out. The microwave/fridge option is probably cheaper in the long run. Heat and eat meals are a lot cheaper at Walmart than at the truck stop.
10. You will not get to shower every day. There are plenty of times you will get to shower. You will probably have plenty of showers that expire before you use them. But after driving for 10+ hours a day, you will usually want to go to sleep. Sometimes, you won't be at a place where you have a shower available because it was the best place to stop for the night. You won't get to shower every day, and that's just a fact of life on the road.
11. Most truck stops have laundry rooms. Most of those laundry rooms are available to the general public. Sometimes the general public will take up all the washers and you will just be pissed off about it. Unfortunately, you can't do much about it but wait to do laundry, either at that stop later or at another stop.
12. Some loads take forever to get loaded. Some loads take forever to get unloaded. You will be stuck waiting at a shipper or receiver at some point. You will get stuck calling like you are obsessed to check on a load. This is especially bad when it's meat being hauled, but Ace and I just waited 2 extra days for a load of gum and life savors (which was still not fully right).
13. Deadlines for delivery (DLDs) are sometimes just given to make you laugh. I know because some shippers treat them as suggestions instead of actual deadlines. All you can do is tell your company and hope that either someone else will be able to swap trailers with you (so the load gets there on time) or that the receiver is willing to change their appointment so that you can get it there on time. If the load is ready by DLD and anything happens, the load is going to be late (unless you can swap trailers).
14. The internet is key to trip planning. Google maps, while not wholly appropriate for trucks, helps give you a good idea on what ways are likely to be good ones to travel. Pay for internet availability. It's not optional.
15. Verizon seems to have the best coverage for phones and internet. You will need a cell phone to contact people at your company. I've already talked about the internet. Most of the big name truck stops have apps for smart phones and there are other services that are useful with apps too. Smart phones are optional, but well worth the money. Plus, then you can play games while waiting to be loaded or unloaded.
This list is by no means exhaustive, but I have some more pressing needs to take care of.
Stay safe and be careful around semis if you are in a 4-wheel vehicle. We'd like you to all stay alive out there.
Sunday, October 6, 2013
You Don't Want All the Details, Really
I'm going to stop apologizing for ignoring this blog for long periods of time. It keeps happening. Mostly because life on a truck is kind of boring unless I'm going to be complaining about the company Ace works for. Given that he's about to switch companies, that is the most ridiculous thing to blog about.
The good news is that we should have a better income and feel a bit more financially stable with the new company. Also, we can get me licensed and driving the truck with him, like we had originally planned. And I can get on the truck right away until we are ready for me to be driving, so no more time apart (they will let him train me, which is awesome).
The bad news is that the current company needs to sent proof of employment and driving records, and they do that once a week and did not do it last week. We're in this weird place where it seems they are trying to annoy us while supposedly they should be doing all they can to keep Ace as a driver.
So, we are waiting.
I'm hoping we'll have switched companies before my birthday in 2 weeks. But we'll see. At this point, all the current company can do is delay it a bit.
Things are looking up, even while we are currently in a holding pattern of waiting.
The good news is that we should have a better income and feel a bit more financially stable with the new company. Also, we can get me licensed and driving the truck with him, like we had originally planned. And I can get on the truck right away until we are ready for me to be driving, so no more time apart (they will let him train me, which is awesome).
The bad news is that the current company needs to sent proof of employment and driving records, and they do that once a week and did not do it last week. We're in this weird place where it seems they are trying to annoy us while supposedly they should be doing all they can to keep Ace as a driver.
So, we are waiting.
I'm hoping we'll have switched companies before my birthday in 2 weeks. But we'll see. At this point, all the current company can do is delay it a bit.
Things are looking up, even while we are currently in a holding pattern of waiting.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Random Randomness
Okay, I am completely terrible about remembering to come back here and post. I think this has been established. Thus, today, you get some random bits.
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On the other hand, Ace and I are talking a lot. We've come to some fair (to me) compromises on dealing with his parents from now on. Basically, I can do everything reasonably possible to not have to be around them and he won't complain. He's a bit annoyed about the part where his father sexually assaulted and harassed me, so he totally understands my desire to stay away.
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Unfortunately for me, we've been in some of the rainier parts of the country lately. I am so ready for some sunshine. My emotions are being a bit more fickle because of the constant grey clouds.
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We've added two new states to our list of states we've been to (new to me, not to Ace). I'd tell you how many that is, but I don't currently have access to the numbers.
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One of the recent updates on my laptop has made it more difficult for me to use Word or Excel. This is part of the reason I don't have numbers on the states. This is really annoying me. WTF Microsoft?
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Ace is considering switching trucking companies. Provided we can get answers to questions. Sometimes the weekend comes at inconvenient times.
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I keep having dreams that I only remember like one thing about when I wake up. It's mostly annoying because I don't really seem to care about these dreams, but they won't quite leave my mind. Last night my dream had something to do with hair pulling (and that is pretty much all I remember about it).
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I am still obsessing about Welcome to Night Vale. I don't think I want help though.
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And that's pretty much been it lately. Well, that and lots of sleep, lots of rain/grey clouds, and lots of driving/waiting.
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On the other hand, Ace and I are talking a lot. We've come to some fair (to me) compromises on dealing with his parents from now on. Basically, I can do everything reasonably possible to not have to be around them and he won't complain. He's a bit annoyed about the part where his father sexually assaulted and harassed me, so he totally understands my desire to stay away.
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Unfortunately for me, we've been in some of the rainier parts of the country lately. I am so ready for some sunshine. My emotions are being a bit more fickle because of the constant grey clouds.
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We've added two new states to our list of states we've been to (new to me, not to Ace). I'd tell you how many that is, but I don't currently have access to the numbers.
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One of the recent updates on my laptop has made it more difficult for me to use Word or Excel. This is part of the reason I don't have numbers on the states. This is really annoying me. WTF Microsoft?
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Ace is considering switching trucking companies. Provided we can get answers to questions. Sometimes the weekend comes at inconvenient times.
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I keep having dreams that I only remember like one thing about when I wake up. It's mostly annoying because I don't really seem to care about these dreams, but they won't quite leave my mind. Last night my dream had something to do with hair pulling (and that is pretty much all I remember about it).
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I am still obsessing about Welcome to Night Vale. I don't think I want help though.
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And that's pretty much been it lately. Well, that and lots of sleep, lots of rain/grey clouds, and lots of driving/waiting.
Thursday, September 5, 2013
"Can Today Just Be Over Now?" "No."
I'm having one of those days today. The kind where I wonder who okays me being in public, except I have to be for bathroom purposes because I live in a truck and why don't trucks come with toilets? It's not a great day, is what I'm saying.
And it isn't even anything that Ace could fix if he wanted to, because it was something out of his control that made it feel like such a bad day. And something that happened yesterday isn't helping and my brain is going a million miles a minute and nothing is right and why did I get up? (It's kind of loud in my head, is what I'm trying to say.)
Yesterday, we almost had a wreck. It could/would have been a bad one for us. I could have potentially died or at least been in a hospital for a long while. It scared me badly and I don't think I'm fully over that yet, even if the idea of being on the road does not bother me today.
And then today, we had issues with a load that should have been a simple pick up a trailer and drive down the road. It was over-weight. We were picking it up from a drop yard, so we couldn't have the shipper fix it. It wasted a few hours of our day. It wasn't something to get nearly as upset as I seem to be over.
I've also been emotional lately. Weepy about the most random things. I just had my period, so it's not likely hormonal, but I can't rule anything out at this point.
I'm having one of those days. And hopefully the chocolate I'm about to eat will help.
(The title of this post is an actual conversation between Ace and I. He was sympathetic to my desire for the day to be over.)
And it isn't even anything that Ace could fix if he wanted to, because it was something out of his control that made it feel like such a bad day. And something that happened yesterday isn't helping and my brain is going a million miles a minute and nothing is right and why did I get up? (It's kind of loud in my head, is what I'm trying to say.)
Yesterday, we almost had a wreck. It could/would have been a bad one for us. I could have potentially died or at least been in a hospital for a long while. It scared me badly and I don't think I'm fully over that yet, even if the idea of being on the road does not bother me today.
And then today, we had issues with a load that should have been a simple pick up a trailer and drive down the road. It was over-weight. We were picking it up from a drop yard, so we couldn't have the shipper fix it. It wasted a few hours of our day. It wasn't something to get nearly as upset as I seem to be over.
I've also been emotional lately. Weepy about the most random things. I just had my period, so it's not likely hormonal, but I can't rule anything out at this point.
I'm having one of those days. And hopefully the chocolate I'm about to eat will help.
(The title of this post is an actual conversation between Ace and I. He was sympathetic to my desire for the day to be over.)
Friday, August 30, 2013
No Dear, This Wont Text You (Ignore This Title, It Sucks)
The Ring has been destroyed. As I knew it would, based off the movies. I still want to read through the appendices, but I'm not subjecting Ace to them. He's not so interested.
And I'm trying not to obsessively listen to Welcome to Night Vale. Because I think I could do that, but that wouldn't be healthy. The podcast scares me and makes me laugh and makes me love it in equal measure.
I'd like to meet Carlos and his perfect hair. I'd love to meet Cecil and his dulcet tones.
Don't send help. I'm happy over here.
And I'm trying not to obsessively listen to Welcome to Night Vale. Because I think I could do that, but that wouldn't be healthy. The podcast scares me and makes me laugh and makes me love it in equal measure.
I'd like to meet Carlos and his perfect hair. I'd love to meet Cecil and his dulcet tones.
Don't send help. I'm happy over here.
Monday, August 26, 2013
A Few, Short Letters
Dear Readers,
I have not forgotten this blog. I have just been caught up in a cycle of not enough sleep and focusing on reading Lord of the Rings (we're on book 6 and should be done with the actual story by the end of the month!). Hopefully some things will change soon (the lack of enough sleep).
Sorry,
M.A. Smith
Dear Unnamed Trucking Company,
Why did you decide on black trucks? And why do you think driving overnight in the summer is going to lead to anyone getting a good 8 hours of sleep when the truck is too hot during the day? You suck at making good decisions.
Tired and cranky,
M.A. Smith
Dear Miley Cyrus,
I don't even want to know what happened at the VMAs. But nobody respects you, based off of what little I've seen about it. You are not winning over any parents.
So over it,
M.A. Smith
Dear Heat,
I just want to sleep for 8 hours straight. Between you and my bladder that hasn't happened in a bit. Give me a break!
Overly hot,
M.A. Smith
Dear Ace,
You are the best. Even if it's too hot and I'm too tired. I love you lots. Don't change.
Love,
Your wife
I have not forgotten this blog. I have just been caught up in a cycle of not enough sleep and focusing on reading Lord of the Rings (we're on book 6 and should be done with the actual story by the end of the month!). Hopefully some things will change soon (the lack of enough sleep).
Sorry,
M.A. Smith
Dear Unnamed Trucking Company,
Why did you decide on black trucks? And why do you think driving overnight in the summer is going to lead to anyone getting a good 8 hours of sleep when the truck is too hot during the day? You suck at making good decisions.
Tired and cranky,
M.A. Smith
Dear Miley Cyrus,
I don't even want to know what happened at the VMAs. But nobody respects you, based off of what little I've seen about it. You are not winning over any parents.
So over it,
M.A. Smith
Dear Heat,
I just want to sleep for 8 hours straight. Between you and my bladder that hasn't happened in a bit. Give me a break!
Overly hot,
M.A. Smith
Dear Ace,
You are the best. Even if it's too hot and I'm too tired. I love you lots. Don't change.
Love,
Your wife
Monday, July 29, 2013
This Post Is Also Pointless, But At Least It's Not Disgusting
We seem to have hit a small snag on things just running smoothly lately. Last week just had a bunch of fairly small issues that compounded and made for a bad week. This morning added a new, fixable problem that has not helped things feel like they are going right.
That said, we did get off the yard at unnamed trucking company within 48 hours, which is a record. It was going to be within 24, but there were issues with a load and it was just easier to go back to the yard and try again the next day.
And we have plenty of miles under the last two weeks. Which is good, because they pay by the mile, so any time spent sitting is somewhat costly. Especially when it is because of waiting on a load to be loaded or dealing with overages on a load (both of which happened last week, which is at least partly why it was a bad week).
Things work better, of course, when the people you are dealing with at your own company are not crazy. And when other companies don't lie to your company. Friday was not a good day (lots of sitting, not a lot getting fixed, no chance to actually do our laundry like we wanted/needed to).
I would like to urge anyone out there who thinks that going to a truck stop and doing your laundry there is a good idea, at least do the truck drivers a favor and don't use all the machines at one time. If you do, your laundry getting done is cutting into our break time and we only have 10 hours to get any laundry done and try to get 8 hours of sleep before hitting the roads again and driving vehicles that weigh up to 40 tons. Do you want a sleepy driver driving something that would then become a very heavy weapon down the roads you might need to take? (This has happened to us more than once. Why do people who have cars and can visit laundromats or friends or neighbors or family or anywhere else too think their laundry is more urgent than the truck driver who can, at best, maybe make it another day or two before he or she has to wash their clothes?)
It was not a good week last week. And we're both still a bit annoyed right now. (Especially since we only have one computer that can get online right now, because the other one seems to have some virus.)
Can things just smooth out a bit for a few days, please.
That said, we did get off the yard at unnamed trucking company within 48 hours, which is a record. It was going to be within 24, but there were issues with a load and it was just easier to go back to the yard and try again the next day.
And we have plenty of miles under the last two weeks. Which is good, because they pay by the mile, so any time spent sitting is somewhat costly. Especially when it is because of waiting on a load to be loaded or dealing with overages on a load (both of which happened last week, which is at least partly why it was a bad week).
Things work better, of course, when the people you are dealing with at your own company are not crazy. And when other companies don't lie to your company. Friday was not a good day (lots of sitting, not a lot getting fixed, no chance to actually do our laundry like we wanted/needed to).
I would like to urge anyone out there who thinks that going to a truck stop and doing your laundry there is a good idea, at least do the truck drivers a favor and don't use all the machines at one time. If you do, your laundry getting done is cutting into our break time and we only have 10 hours to get any laundry done and try to get 8 hours of sleep before hitting the roads again and driving vehicles that weigh up to 40 tons. Do you want a sleepy driver driving something that would then become a very heavy weapon down the roads you might need to take? (This has happened to us more than once. Why do people who have cars and can visit laundromats or friends or neighbors or family or anywhere else too think their laundry is more urgent than the truck driver who can, at best, maybe make it another day or two before he or she has to wash their clothes?)
It was not a good week last week. And we're both still a bit annoyed right now. (Especially since we only have one computer that can get online right now, because the other one seems to have some virus.)
Can things just smooth out a bit for a few days, please.
Sunday, July 21, 2013
In Which I Rant About What Makes a Fan
In a different part of my life, I spend way too much time on Tumblr looking at pictures of Benedict Cumberbatch. It's a problem that has mostly been solved by being on the truck and adding more blogs that have nothing to do with Benedict Cumberbatch to my Tumblr dashboard.
Apparently, there are people out there who feel the need to dictate what a fan of something is and who it is not. And this has made me fairly angry. Because why does anyone feel they have a right to determine who is a fan? Who declared them king or queen with the power to dictate who is a fan and who is pretending to be one?
As usual, it was because of something stupid (with a few not so stupid but very childish threats) and it has grown into something even bigger and more stupid. It's growing into something that can hurt the show/books that all these people are claiming to love.
I am declaring, right here, that I don't care what characters you would like to see in a relationship on a show or in a book or movie. That does not determine whether or not you are a fan. If you like what you see, you are a fan. If you are excited about it, you are a fan. If you have only seen 5 minutes and wish you could see the entire thing, no matter how big it is, you are a fan.
Everyone else can back off. Because your opinion on what makes a fan is skewed there. If they like it, they are a fan. Period. That's all it takes. They don't have to dedicate time and energy into anything more than liking it and they are a fan.
There you go world, go be fans. Just stop bringing your drama into my already over dramatized life. I have sleep to catch up on.
Apparently, there are people out there who feel the need to dictate what a fan of something is and who it is not. And this has made me fairly angry. Because why does anyone feel they have a right to determine who is a fan? Who declared them king or queen with the power to dictate who is a fan and who is pretending to be one?
As usual, it was because of something stupid (with a few not so stupid but very childish threats) and it has grown into something even bigger and more stupid. It's growing into something that can hurt the show/books that all these people are claiming to love.
I am declaring, right here, that I don't care what characters you would like to see in a relationship on a show or in a book or movie. That does not determine whether or not you are a fan. If you like what you see, you are a fan. If you are excited about it, you are a fan. If you have only seen 5 minutes and wish you could see the entire thing, no matter how big it is, you are a fan.
Everyone else can back off. Because your opinion on what makes a fan is skewed there. If they like it, they are a fan. Period. That's all it takes. They don't have to dedicate time and energy into anything more than liking it and they are a fan.
There you go world, go be fans. Just stop bringing your drama into my already over dramatized life. I have sleep to catch up on.
Thursday, July 18, 2013
This Post Is Not Worth Reading
I apologize in advance for today. After ignoring this blog for way longer than reasonable, I came today to whine about how I'm not feeling as good as I'd like to.
It starts at about midnight last night. I had gone to sleep at 7 pm (Ace and I hadn't quite had enough sleep lately, and I was exhausted) and woke up between midnight and 1 and needed to go to the bathroom. While I was taking care of business, Ace texted me and asked if I wanted to get dinner while we were inside. Not seeing any particular reason not to, I said something along the lines of I guess.
After I finished eating dinner, I stopped by another bathroom, because my bladder was uncomfortably demanding I go again (I'm pretty sure I may have a mild UTI and maybe some minor dehydration, but without checking with a doctor it's hard to be sure). While in the bathroom, I grew uncomfortably cold. I walked back to the table, where Ace was still eating, and he handed me the key to the truck and told me to go ahead and go out (apparently I looked like I was needing to lay down). I made it to the truck and wrapped up in my blanket, but I couldn't seem to get myself to lay down and be comfortable.
So, I decided to sit in the front seat and watch for Ace (even though he was going to text me when he was on his way). I got out a slightly garbled text to let Ace know I wasn't feeling good (the word throw came out as hrpw), and then I was opening the door to throw up on the ground/steps to the truck. Ace then told me to grab the trash can (too late). He bought me some peppermints and some Pepto Bismol before he came out to the truck. Unfortunately for him, the sight, sound, and smell of vomit causes him to respond in a like manner, so neither of us got to actually digest the meal he had just bought for us. While he was recovering from his reaction to my stomach's protest, I suddenly had to rush back inside.
Apparently, my body was not satisfied with just throwing up. All I will say is that I felt amazingly better after and was just tired. The Pepto at the least didn't hurt my now calm stomach. And I slept until the alarm for us getting up and taking a shower went off this morning at 6:30.
While my stomach is still acting a bit more queasy than I'd like, I seem to be only tired at this point. And I will admit that sometimes my stomach can't quite differentiate between hunger and nausea (after last night, I'm being extra cautious). I don't think Ace has much of a problem with that. The only good thing is that I know it wasn't food poisoning because I threw up a bit too soon for that to be the case. Just my stomach being very unhappy.
And now for another peppermint, because this is not helping my stomach calm down.
It starts at about midnight last night. I had gone to sleep at 7 pm (Ace and I hadn't quite had enough sleep lately, and I was exhausted) and woke up between midnight and 1 and needed to go to the bathroom. While I was taking care of business, Ace texted me and asked if I wanted to get dinner while we were inside. Not seeing any particular reason not to, I said something along the lines of I guess.
After I finished eating dinner, I stopped by another bathroom, because my bladder was uncomfortably demanding I go again (I'm pretty sure I may have a mild UTI and maybe some minor dehydration, but without checking with a doctor it's hard to be sure). While in the bathroom, I grew uncomfortably cold. I walked back to the table, where Ace was still eating, and he handed me the key to the truck and told me to go ahead and go out (apparently I looked like I was needing to lay down). I made it to the truck and wrapped up in my blanket, but I couldn't seem to get myself to lay down and be comfortable.
So, I decided to sit in the front seat and watch for Ace (even though he was going to text me when he was on his way). I got out a slightly garbled text to let Ace know I wasn't feeling good (the word throw came out as hrpw), and then I was opening the door to throw up on the ground/steps to the truck. Ace then told me to grab the trash can (too late). He bought me some peppermints and some Pepto Bismol before he came out to the truck. Unfortunately for him, the sight, sound, and smell of vomit causes him to respond in a like manner, so neither of us got to actually digest the meal he had just bought for us. While he was recovering from his reaction to my stomach's protest, I suddenly had to rush back inside.
Apparently, my body was not satisfied with just throwing up. All I will say is that I felt amazingly better after and was just tired. The Pepto at the least didn't hurt my now calm stomach. And I slept until the alarm for us getting up and taking a shower went off this morning at 6:30.
While my stomach is still acting a bit more queasy than I'd like, I seem to be only tired at this point. And I will admit that sometimes my stomach can't quite differentiate between hunger and nausea (after last night, I'm being extra cautious). I don't think Ace has much of a problem with that. The only good thing is that I know it wasn't food poisoning because I threw up a bit too soon for that to be the case. Just my stomach being very unhappy.
And now for another peppermint, because this is not helping my stomach calm down.
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Studying, But Not What I Expected to Be Studying
Well, I am obviously not getting any better about remembering to post while we are on the road. But, I have a good reason lately. I've been working on a project that spawned a second project.
It started like this: I was listening to a sermon that we had playing overnight. It woke me up, and I was awake, so I had little else better to do. In it, the teacher was talking about how his mother had typed up scriptures for the teacher and his wife to stand on when they were believing God for a child. And I thought, "I should look up scriptures to do that." So, I started doing that.
Well, then we took a week's vacation and I relaxed and didn't work on the list. But when we got back on the truck, I started back up. And then I saw a verse that I know I've read before, but it didn't quite hit me the way it did this time I read it. It was Colossians 3:21 and in the Amplified, it reads as "Fathers, do not provoke or irritate or fret your children [do not be hard on them or harass them], lest they become discouraged and sullen and morose and feel inferior and frustrated. [Do not break their spirit.]"
So, I looked up all the things not to do to children and how they would become and feel if you did those things. Because words are important, and I wanted to clearly understand what God meant by that. And that lead me to I Corinthians 13:4-8, which is all about love. And I realized that we are supposed to be parents that live what is said about love, which would avoid all of those things.
Basically, I seem to be starting to get a lesson about parenting together, which will hopefully lead back to me getting together my list of scriptures on parenting. (In other news, I know at least one thing that God is obviously gearing me up for, at some point.
So, yeah. I'm over here (and there but maybe not there) doing research about parenting. (No, I'm not currently pregnant. I'm just finishing up my period, thanks for asking.) If nothing else, I should be well prepared when I do become a mother. But the timing seems to be right for doing all this research and getting this information together.
Nicely, I have at least one ministry that I've got CDs from that I know teaches about marriage and parenting. I'll go through all my CDs and make notes soon. I am going to have lots of information on hand about children and parenting. And maybe someday, I'll be teaching others what God and others have taught me.
It started like this: I was listening to a sermon that we had playing overnight. It woke me up, and I was awake, so I had little else better to do. In it, the teacher was talking about how his mother had typed up scriptures for the teacher and his wife to stand on when they were believing God for a child. And I thought, "I should look up scriptures to do that." So, I started doing that.
Well, then we took a week's vacation and I relaxed and didn't work on the list. But when we got back on the truck, I started back up. And then I saw a verse that I know I've read before, but it didn't quite hit me the way it did this time I read it. It was Colossians 3:21 and in the Amplified, it reads as "Fathers, do not provoke or irritate or fret your children [do not be hard on them or harass them], lest they become discouraged and sullen and morose and feel inferior and frustrated. [Do not break their spirit.]"
So, I looked up all the things not to do to children and how they would become and feel if you did those things. Because words are important, and I wanted to clearly understand what God meant by that. And that lead me to I Corinthians 13:4-8, which is all about love. And I realized that we are supposed to be parents that live what is said about love, which would avoid all of those things.
Basically, I seem to be starting to get a lesson about parenting together, which will hopefully lead back to me getting together my list of scriptures on parenting. (In other news, I know at least one thing that God is obviously gearing me up for, at some point.
So, yeah. I'm over here (and there but maybe not there) doing research about parenting. (No, I'm not currently pregnant. I'm just finishing up my period, thanks for asking.) If nothing else, I should be well prepared when I do become a mother. But the timing seems to be right for doing all this research and getting this information together.
Nicely, I have at least one ministry that I've got CDs from that I know teaches about marriage and parenting. I'll go through all my CDs and make notes soon. I am going to have lots of information on hand about children and parenting. And maybe someday, I'll be teaching others what God and others have taught me.
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Reflections
I'm in an odd mood right now. I think part of it is the fact that Ace and I finished the Harry Potter series on Wednesday and I'm not reading anything new currently. We'll be going through The Lord of the Rings trilogy next, but we don't get back on the road until Monday at the earliest.
Part of the issue is that the future is back up in the air again. Ace doesn't want to leave his current company while he is mad, so we've not talked to the company we think we want to go with next. I totally understand, and since we did get off the truck mostly on time I'm not going to try to argue the point.
On the plus side, we have enjoyed our time off. We got new glasses and prescription sunglasses. We replaced some clothes. We bought some toys. The only thing that would have been nicer would have been if I could have gotten the book I wanted (Good Omens, some day I will own you!). Well, that and our mail not getting lost in UPS's system (which has lead to one uncomfortable phone call to listen to already, and will probably lead to another).
So, I'm calling this vacation, the first we've ever taken, successful. Over all. And that's what matters.
Part of the issue is that the future is back up in the air again. Ace doesn't want to leave his current company while he is mad, so we've not talked to the company we think we want to go with next. I totally understand, and since we did get off the truck mostly on time I'm not going to try to argue the point.
On the plus side, we have enjoyed our time off. We got new glasses and prescription sunglasses. We replaced some clothes. We bought some toys. The only thing that would have been nicer would have been if I could have gotten the book I wanted (Good Omens, some day I will own you!). Well, that and our mail not getting lost in UPS's system (which has lead to one uncomfortable phone call to listen to already, and will probably lead to another).
So, I'm calling this vacation, the first we've ever taken, successful. Over all. And that's what matters.
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
Unnamed Trucking Company Letter
Dear Unnamed Trucking Company,
I am sorry that my existence seems to be troubling your lives lately. I know that it's frustrating that I want my husband to actually have some time off. I mean, in your eyes, he's had time off as recently as April and what does he need more time off for anyway?
The thing is, he hasn't really had time off since March. When we took a few days to visit some friends. In April, we were trying to get the truck fixed. And that didn't really happen until we were back on the yard and supervising the fixing ourselves. Even then, we left with one of the main problems still unfixed (unbeknownst to us at the time).
However, it is our 10th anniversary in just over a week. I have demanded only one thing: not to be on the truck (or in a car, really) on our anniversary. It's really the simplest demand possible. I'm fairly sure most wives demand something more impressive for their 10th anniversary, but my desires right now are fairly simple. We even gave you at least most of June for notice that we wanted time off around then and where we wanted to go.
The fact that this notice did not seem to be enough for you is hardly my fault. My husband cannot go back in time to change our anniversary for you. And he wouldn't even if he could.
While we are off the truck, we will be talking with another company. They seem to treat their drivers better, and that appeals to us right now. How things go from there partially depends on their answers and partially on how close to our anniversary it gets before we get off the truck. There are a few other factors, but those are some of the stronger ones right now.
So, Unnamed Trucking Company, maybe in the future you should remember that your drivers are people. They have lives outside their job for you. And if you keep treating them badly, it's not going to go well for your company in the future. After all, truck drivers are smart enough to know when they are being shafted and to ask drivers from other companies how that company treats their drivers.
Cordially,
M.A. Smith
I am sorry that my existence seems to be troubling your lives lately. I know that it's frustrating that I want my husband to actually have some time off. I mean, in your eyes, he's had time off as recently as April and what does he need more time off for anyway?
The thing is, he hasn't really had time off since March. When we took a few days to visit some friends. In April, we were trying to get the truck fixed. And that didn't really happen until we were back on the yard and supervising the fixing ourselves. Even then, we left with one of the main problems still unfixed (unbeknownst to us at the time).
However, it is our 10th anniversary in just over a week. I have demanded only one thing: not to be on the truck (or in a car, really) on our anniversary. It's really the simplest demand possible. I'm fairly sure most wives demand something more impressive for their 10th anniversary, but my desires right now are fairly simple. We even gave you at least most of June for notice that we wanted time off around then and where we wanted to go.
The fact that this notice did not seem to be enough for you is hardly my fault. My husband cannot go back in time to change our anniversary for you. And he wouldn't even if he could.
While we are off the truck, we will be talking with another company. They seem to treat their drivers better, and that appeals to us right now. How things go from there partially depends on their answers and partially on how close to our anniversary it gets before we get off the truck. There are a few other factors, but those are some of the stronger ones right now.
So, Unnamed Trucking Company, maybe in the future you should remember that your drivers are people. They have lives outside their job for you. And if you keep treating them badly, it's not going to go well for your company in the future. After all, truck drivers are smart enough to know when they are being shafted and to ask drivers from other companies how that company treats their drivers.
Cordially,
M.A. Smith
Friday, June 14, 2013
Why We Are Considering a Change
One of the reasons we are considering a change of places of employment for Ace is how much he's being annoyed by, well, frankly everyone but his driving manager and about two other people (one of whom he hardly ever talks to, so there's that).
Case in point: On Wednesday, we get up at 2 am to deliver a load at 7 am. We finally get to leave with an empty trailer at 10:10 am. By the time we're done with sending off our load sheets (so we can get paid) and doing a post trip inspection (or PTI), it is about noon. When we get done with our trailer being unloaded, we have to send something off via the Qualcom (basically a computer with very limited things it can do) to the company to tell them what time it is, when we will be available for dispatch, how much unloading was, all that fun stuff. We wanted a day and a half to just relax and not deal with anyone at the company, so we put in Friday (today) at 8 am for when we would be available.
Somehow, the system didn't show that we had a trailer, despite one being put in on the unloaded message. That is potentially a glitch. That is only minorly an issue in this story.
So, the planner, doing his job, re-entered stuff in for us having the trailer. Only he didn't pay any attention to when we said we would be available for dispatch. So he sent us a load yesterday and called to let us know. Then he proceeded to interrupt Ace every time he tried to talk after Ace told him that he was planning on taking yesterday off. He proclaimed that Ace had had a day off Wednesday (since when is a 10 hour day a day off?) and that he had hours he could drive.
Nicely, Ace's driving manager was able to go talk to the guy, get us back off that load and point out that he was the reason he was seeing us as available when we had originally said we wouldn't be. A few hours later, we got a different load assignment, but before Ace could accept it, he was sent a message saying that it was for a different driver. This morning, after leaving us waiting for a while, he sent a message asking if Ace was ready yet. We are both annoyed with that planner, as he seems to barely be doing his job (The last time we had him planning something for us, he didn't send us a plan until after we dropped off a load that we had all day to deliver, so we wanted to know when we would pick up and where as we could wait to deliver until close to pick up time. We ended up wasting quite a few hours that day sitting around because of that.).
So, with the diminishing respect for anyone who works in the offices, it is not very surprising that we are considering a change. Preferably to a company that we haven't heard any complaints about thus far (in fact, we've only heard good things about them, even by their own drivers).
Case in point: On Wednesday, we get up at 2 am to deliver a load at 7 am. We finally get to leave with an empty trailer at 10:10 am. By the time we're done with sending off our load sheets (so we can get paid) and doing a post trip inspection (or PTI), it is about noon. When we get done with our trailer being unloaded, we have to send something off via the Qualcom (basically a computer with very limited things it can do) to the company to tell them what time it is, when we will be available for dispatch, how much unloading was, all that fun stuff. We wanted a day and a half to just relax and not deal with anyone at the company, so we put in Friday (today) at 8 am for when we would be available.
Somehow, the system didn't show that we had a trailer, despite one being put in on the unloaded message. That is potentially a glitch. That is only minorly an issue in this story.
So, the planner, doing his job, re-entered stuff in for us having the trailer. Only he didn't pay any attention to when we said we would be available for dispatch. So he sent us a load yesterday and called to let us know. Then he proceeded to interrupt Ace every time he tried to talk after Ace told him that he was planning on taking yesterday off. He proclaimed that Ace had had a day off Wednesday (since when is a 10 hour day a day off?) and that he had hours he could drive.
Nicely, Ace's driving manager was able to go talk to the guy, get us back off that load and point out that he was the reason he was seeing us as available when we had originally said we wouldn't be. A few hours later, we got a different load assignment, but before Ace could accept it, he was sent a message saying that it was for a different driver. This morning, after leaving us waiting for a while, he sent a message asking if Ace was ready yet. We are both annoyed with that planner, as he seems to barely be doing his job (The last time we had him planning something for us, he didn't send us a plan until after we dropped off a load that we had all day to deliver, so we wanted to know when we would pick up and where as we could wait to deliver until close to pick up time. We ended up wasting quite a few hours that day sitting around because of that.).
So, with the diminishing respect for anyone who works in the offices, it is not very surprising that we are considering a change. Preferably to a company that we haven't heard any complaints about thus far (in fact, we've only heard good things about them, even by their own drivers).
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
On Anniversaries and Changes
Ace and I have our 10th wedding anniversary coming up. We're taking a week off. My only demand has been that we be off the truck by roughly 10pm the night before. (All right, I've also asked for cheesecake, but that is a request, not a demand.)
Ace has never had quite that much time off. At least not since his first break during training.
While we are off, we're going to talk do a different company. We've had a few too many problems lately with the current one. We sat from 7 pm Friday until 1 am Tuesday on Memorial Day weekend. We got paid $270 in compensation for that. None of that actually saw our checking account for various reasons.
We are not amused. And we are tired of Ace being called for favors and getting messed up financially for doing them, with no one willing to help us out in return.
It's coming up to being time for a change.
So, change we are looking for.
(I am still frustrated and tired and overwhelmed by some things. But I'm better, knowing we have a plan.)
Ace has never had quite that much time off. At least not since his first break during training.
While we are off, we're going to talk do a different company. We've had a few too many problems lately with the current one. We sat from 7 pm Friday until 1 am Tuesday on Memorial Day weekend. We got paid $270 in compensation for that. None of that actually saw our checking account for various reasons.
We are not amused. And we are tired of Ace being called for favors and getting messed up financially for doing them, with no one willing to help us out in return.
It's coming up to being time for a change.
So, change we are looking for.
(I am still frustrated and tired and overwhelmed by some things. But I'm better, knowing we have a plan.)
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