Tiny Living

I admit that while I generally try to not judge people, I can't quite help but wonder about people who decide to live in tiny homes. The people who, willingly, decide that living in 134-ish square feet is for them. I wonder if they realize how difficult it will be before they start.

I live in a truck cab, so I know tiny living. 134 square feet would actually be an upgrade for Ace and I. We have bunk beds and storage cabinets and, as a treat, a fridge (we aren't sure if the microwave will work now, so we will have to test that soon). There is no where to really cook anything more than canned foods really. All our clothes stay in bags, because the storage space is taken up with food, drinks, and other things that make life easier on the road (like DVDs, apparently). The only time Ace and I are apart is when we take showers, unless we share one, or are in a hotel room. We have about 3 weeks worth of clothes that we haul around, because that is easier than trying to wash them weekly, but that is more of a trucking thing than a tiny living thing.

We have very little mystery in our lives at this point. At least from each other. The good news is that we figured out how to share small spaces without fighting before we started living on a truck. And we quickly realized that having our own computers was a must, otherwise violence might ensue. We are both fairly calm people, but a lack of privacy (we usually only have a curtain separating us) and constantly being together can still get any two people to fight. And after a certain point, you know what your spouse/partner/whatever sounds like when waking up or just breathing when you spend this much time in tight quarters. My husband knows all those things that women usually prefer to pretend don't happen with their husband, because it's not like I can really hide anything.

Small spaces can easily be overwhelmed with bad smells (sweaty socks/sweat in the recirculating air/burnt food/farts/whatever other bad smell), because there is only so much room for them to dissipate. We use Fabreeze to help, but that requires us to be able to spray it and let it sit for a bit sometimes, which we can't always do (and it doesn't really help the recirculating air much). Air fresheners can only do so much. And if we go to any dirt/gravel lots (which happens), the inside of the truck gets dirtier than usual. It's bad enough with no dirt/gravel lots and just food particles.

I understand the pull of simplifying your life and getting rid of stuff, but after living in such a small space for so many years, I want multiple rooms and a few hundred square feet (minimum) of living space. I want to be able to have room away from Ace, so we can both grow and then come back together.

I'm not trying to talk anyone out of living in a small space, there are benefits to not having much stuff, and Kindle is a good way to have a mobile, portable library (with lots of free or inexpensive books, as my laptop can suggest). Realizing how little you need to have a happy, comfortable life is not a bad thing. But keep in mind there are downsides to tiny living. And one of them is that not having much stuff means not being able to always get more stuff as you want it. You have to keep your stuff fairly pared down to stay living tiny.

International Woman's Day

To start off, I want to proclaim that I am for women. I am for men. I am for equality among genders. And I'm happy to spend a day, a week, a month, a year, a lifetime dedicated to honoring women in history. We should honor all the people who have made advances in things and made our lives better. If they only made one life better, it's enough for us to celebrate their life.

Having said that, what was the point of women protesting today? That is a legitimate question. Why were they protesting?

As a woman in a male-dominated field (truck drivers are mostly male), I can honestly say that I have never been discriminated against because of my gender, except in one specific spot (and I don't know that gender is what caused the issue, so I can't fully feel comfortable blaming that). In fact, I've mostly had good reactions to me being a female who drives a truck. Probably because I don't seem to fit the stereotype of a female truck driver.

I've never had someone act like I couldn't do my job because I'm female. They've been impressed and surprised, but not demeaning. I've never been paid less than my husband, which is more impressive because he's got a longer history of driving than I do. (This is mainly because of the fact that I came in as an owner-operator, which got a set pay no matter how long you had been driving. And the truck we currently drive gets paid x per mile and we make y% of that amount.) This is an industry that does not care what your gender is, as long as you can drive. Most pay is based off of experience, unless the company pays a set amount per mile for anyone.

Trucking, while not exactly female friendly in terms of cleanliness, is an equal opportunity for all, regardless of race, gender, or religion.

If it has to do with the government not helping to support the purchase of birth control, I'm not personally overly concerned with that. I might be willing to protest about not being taxed at a higher amount for hygiene products, as that is not something women just buy for fun. (Seriously, most of us would be happy to skip having periods, if that were an option without removing the option of having kids. Periods are not fun, but should be at least minorly understood by all.) I have options besides pills for birth control (including condoms, an IUD, and abstinence). I don't have a lot of options about having a period.

Anyway. Congratulations on being a human! I hope you make things better in the world! And please, explain what women were protesting today by "not showing up to their jobs", because that would just get me in a world of trouble with several people if I had done that (the trucking company and my husband, at minimum).

Random Thoughts No One Else Probably Cares About

I still suck at this posting more than once in a blue moon thing. Sorry. I hadn't quite realized how long it had been since I had posted.

Since I don't really have much in the way of coherent thoughts right now, here is a random list of what is on my mind.

1. Some people are really good at circumventing the rules. Sometimes it's impressive. Sometimes it's bad. (Ace is reading me a follow up article about a kid who got suspended for selling full sugar Pepsi. The kid figured out how to keep selling the soft drinks without breaking the rules.)

2. Why are we, as a society, so hung up about gender and what people have in their pants? Does it matter if I'm female or male to anyone other than Ace and me? Should it?

3. Did I use proper grammar in that last point? Should it have been Ace and I instead of Ace and me?

4. I need to post that email that made me laugh sometime. With the explanation as to why it was so funny.

5. Ace and I traded trucks. We love our new one, even if there are a few things we don't love about it it. It is so much better than the last truck. (I can drive this one without messing up my hip!)

6. I should post about weird/random/whatever things I've seen since I've started driving. (I have a weird story about a wheel. Short, but weird.)

7. Today kind of sucked. But we made it through the day without crashing the truck or yelling at anyone.

8. I had to pay a quarter to use a bathroom that didn't even have soap or paper towels (or a hand dryer) to clean my hands. That sucks.

9. I'm glad people are talking about depression and not just ignoring it. Why do we stigmatize mental illnesses? Are we afraid they are contagious?

10. I don't have a ten, I just like even numbers.

My brain is kind of active lately. But now I think it's time for a nap. Hopefully I'll get back soon with those posts.

No Answers

Last Friday, I went back to truck driving school. I needed to shake off the rust from roughly 30 days of not driving. I spent 4 days working on backing and driving. I learned a lot, and felt frustrated and sore and then on Monday successful. I felt ready to take my test on Tuesday, which was a change from the last time.

I really don't want to talk about that test yesterday. I've got another 30 days before I can test again. It wasn't that I couldn't do the backs (which is where my problems cropped up). There seemed to be some problems with the equipment I was given and I wasn't experienced enough to compensate. I'm surprisingly okay with everything.

But that's not what I wanted to talk about. That's just me updating about what's gone on while I've been away from the blog.

While I was at school, I was asked lots of questions about who Ace and I were going to work for and if he was already driving or waiting on me. I had people asking why Ace wasn't at least working a local job. I had answers for most of the questions, but not all of them. We are still trying to figure things out and some things were complicated.

People keep asking me questions. I don't have answers for them. And I'm feeling frazzled and tired. I don't know any more. Asking me what I want for dinner is kind of too much right now. I don't know and I need to not have anyone ask.

I'm feeling a bit empty. I'm not angry, I'm not particularly frustrated, I'm just mostly numb. The world can just hold onto its questions for a while. They don't need me to attempt to answer them today. Maybe I'll have some answers for them tomorrow.

But for today, let me be.

Making Plans

Ace and I have been talking, a lot, about our questions about truck driving. It's not the driving part that has us asking questions, it's the other stuff.

"Do they charge for taking showers at truck stops?" "Should we buy laundry detergent that we'll have to figure out how to split while we are in training? Or just buy the smallest bottles we can find and hopefully finish them up quickly after training is over?" "How often will we have days off?" "How often do you think we'll be able to go grocery shopping?" "If we pay this and do that, how much do you think we will have saved up at six months? a year?"

We're trying to get things organized and figure out what we need to take with us when we go for on the job training. Obviously, we'll need clothes, and I'm taking my pillow, but do we need sheets for while we're in training? We obviously will need to eat, but are we going to be driving trucks with food in them or eating out for the most part while we're in training?

On the plus side, we still have over 3 weeks to find answers to most of these questions. We're already planning the purchase of my cell phone, so Ace and I can talk to each other when we are apart during training. We know what phone we are getting (and it's cheaper than when I first found it) and it's not something my in-laws can complain too much about.

I'm excited about our changes, but I'm nervous too. What if I hate driving a truck? (After about a year, it may not matter, because we may make changes that would let me be a housewife again.) What if I suck at it? (Okay, the trucking school wouldn't let me go take a test yet if I suck at driving, but still.) What if I find I can't do it after we've invested all this money into it? (How would that be different from my degree in Accounting, other than the fact that truck driving school is shorter and less expensive?) My questions are most silly and should be all answered in just a few weeks. But they are there for now.

In all this, Ace and I have been doing a lot of talking about our future. And this is a great opportunity for us to pay off all our debts, while leaving our monthly expenses low, and maybe even start investing for the future. We'll still get to spend a ton of time together, and we're planning on getting a wifi hotspot in the truck so we can still get online while we're on the road. Things are looking up. So, I refuse to let my questions keep me down. For every argument I could make about how this could blow up in our face, I've got about a dozen more about how this is the best decision for our current circumstances (and the biggest thing is that we'll be on our own again, so I won't have to deal with his parents' brand of craziness on a regular basis).

Look out USA, here we come.

NaBloPoMo Day 27

Ace, Taz (my new friend, called the name she gave me permission to use), and I watched Avatar Friday night. Her kids were spending the night with their grandparents and we hung out and watched a movie. I was surprised at how much I enjoyed the movie.

I had heard that it was about being green, and I guess that message was in the movie some, but it wasn't the message that hit me. Instead, I was surprised at how much the political message that was much more obvious seemed so appropriate. It surprised me how much I don't think about where our troops go and what the culture is like there.

I know that in Iraq there are families. They are probably fairly similar to the ones I grew up seeing on TV. They are trying to live their lives and walk their faith. And then we come in and fight a war in their country or try to convince them to change to a lifestyle we are more comfortable with.

We don't consider what is special to them. We think we are superior just because we are different and live in a generally more developed nation. We don't listen to them to find out what is important or why they would want to live the way they are. We don't show them respect. And then we wonder why we are hated as a nation.

I don't know that those families in Iraq are right. I don't know that they are wrong. I just know that they are different in ways that probably don't matter. I know that we should show other people, other cultures, and other nations respect. Who is to say that we are right? What if we are wrong?

There are always two sides to every story. Both sides think they are right, or at least less wrong. Maybe it's time we start listening to both sides before we decide.

NaBloPoMo Day 5

or What Makes a Family Anyway?

The main book I wanted to pick up from the library Wednesday was a book called One Big Happy Family. It's a book with essays by various writers about different types of families you can find in these times. It's been interesting, and it's had me thinking.

What makes a family? Is it blood? Is it experiences? Is it living under one roof? Or is it love?

The common theme in the essays I've read so far has been one of love. The love of a husband and wife. The love of a parent for a child. The type of love that surpasses cultural challenges and societal norms for the areas they live in. The type of love that puts someone else's needs over their own.

The essay that has stuck with me the most, so far, has been one by a woman who is (or was) trying to figure out what her relationship with her son's nanny is now that some life changes demand that they are redefining things. Are they friends? Are they family?

How do we define family? How does someone go from stranger to friend to family member? I don't have answers to those questions, despite having it happen. In the absence of my extended family on my mom's side, I sort of made my own extended family. And yet, I can't say how these people, who mean a lot to me and feel like important bits of my family, came to be in that place.

Ace and I have been talking about various things that made me want to read about different types of families. It's probably a good thing. It makes me think, it makes me grow. And yet, it leaves me with questions.

How do we decide what makes a family?

A Quick Question for You

In an effort to focus on something other than being slightly annoyed with Ace over stupid stuff, I'm going to instead focus on the other thing that is bothering me right now.

Why do back closing bras have bows on the front in between the breasts?

On one hand, I understand that women want to look cute/sexy for their significant others (or just for themselves). But do men really care about the bow? Do other women?

On the other hand, it always seems to pop up, annoyingly, to be an obvious bump under my shirts. One that looks totally unnatural. I doubt that Ace gives any thought to there being a bow on my bra when he's taking it off me. He's kind of distracted with what's underneath the bra.

So why are the bra designers continuing to stick bows on the front of bras? Does the bow provide structural integrity? Why is it there? Is the only solution to have bras that close in the front? And don't bras that close in the front just provide different problems, like hooks that come undone when they weren't supposed to?

Why? Can't someone please give me a reason?

The Hilarity of Spam Part 9

In lieu of me thinking of a whole post by myself, I'm back to mocking my spam. Maybe soon I'll be back writing all on my own.

>Good day,

Good day.

>This is to inform you that I am a delegate from the United Nations >Compensation Commission, This is to notify you finally about the
>outstanding settlement of your compensation which is being given out by
>the United Nations Compensation Commission. This compensation is being
>made to all victims that have lost their money through any online
>transactions or as a result of Scam activities. It has come to our notice
>that many of you have lost your money by falling victim to some internet
>fraudsters.

At the end of sentences, most people put periods. This spammer decided on a comma at the end of the first sentence. Interesting choice. Then, no commas around the word finally even though it would make sense. Does the UN have a Compensation Commission? (If you look it up, would you please let me know.) I haven't lost any money to fraudsters.

>As a result of this scam activities spreading over the internet, the
>United Nations Human Settlements Programme, UN-HABITAT have decided to get
>details of most victims who were previously scammed by these fraudsters.

Does the UN use English spelling? Why would the UN Human Settlements Program be called UN-HABITAT? Also, I'm still not a victim who was scammed.

>Your outstanding Compensation Cheque payment of $2,759,389 USD is to help
>settle all your debts and start a new business.

Although if they want to send me the Compensation Check (or Cheque), I'll be happy to take it. Over two million dollars would definitely settle my debts.

>We have concluded all the necessary arrangements towards the release of
>your settlement Check sum of $2,759,389 USD with the financial committee
>of the United Nations Human Settlements Programme in collaboration with
>the United Parcel Service LTD (UPS) Nigeria, to deliver the check sum of
>$2,759,389 USD which is registered with Ref No: UNCC 89-5162/UPS to your
>Compensation Check Parcel.

They don't know my name, but they've gotten everything cleared for my check. Sure, why shouldn't I buy that? Oh, because my brain works. Also, why are they switching to check now? Why didn't they change it to program if the were changing to check? Is the UPS in Nigeria? Why would UPS Nigeria have anything to do with this?

>You are therefore to contact the United Parcel Service LTD (UPS) Nigeria,
>with the below information in order to claim your compensation check.

Shouldn't these spammers be able to tell UPS Nigeria who I am? And once they used mentioned what UPS stood for (as if I didn't already know), they didn't need to say it again in the next paragraph/sentence.

>Take note that we have not pay for the shipment of your Check Parcel as
>you will be required to pay the shipping/handling charges for your
>compensation check to be deliverd to you.

The English in this paragraph is not so great (have not pay doesn't make sense). Shouldn't they have been able to take the shipping/handling out of the check before they set everything up? How are things deliverd?

>Name:
>Address:
>City:
>State:
>Country:
>Direct Telephone Number:

Name: You should know this already, spammer.
Address: It's in your database with my name.
City: With my address.
State: With my city.
Country: Elbonia. Or with my State. Or, shouldn't my city and state tell you which country? (multiple choice answer)
Direct Telephone Number: With my name & address.

>=================================
>United Parcel Service Nigeria LTD
>Plot 781 Emeka Anyaoku Street
>Area Eleven Garki
>FCT-Abuja
>Nigeria.
>Tel: +234-813-643-9535
>Email: ups-deleiveryservice@live.com
>=================================

Okay, now I'm confused. Is the LTD supposed to be before or after the word Nigeria? I give no promises that any of this information is correct.

>Accept our regards.
>Deese Ruth
>UN-HABITAT Information Officer

Thanks for your regards, but I don't know what to do with them.
M.A. Smith
Housewife & Generally Well Informed Person

The Hilarity of Spam Part 8

The subject of this e-mail was ATTENTION YOUR AUDIENCE IS NEEDED!! The subject line alone interested me, since I know that I don't have much of an audience. But, since you were needed, how could I resist.

>Hello

Hello. I normally use punctuation after my greetings when writing someone.

>On behalf of the Trustees and Executor of the estate of Late Engr. Jürge
>Krügger. I once again try to notify you as my earlier letter was returned
>undelivered. I wish to notify you that late Engr. Jürge Krügger made you
>a beneficiary to his WILL. He left the sum of Thirty Million, One Hundred
>Thousand Dollars (USD$30, 100.000.00) to you in the Codicil and last
>testament to his WILL.

I've never heard of the Late Engr. Jürge Krügger (Is Late part of his name?). Also, your first sentence was a sentence fragment. I'm not fully sure the second sentence actually makes sense. Does WILL stand for something? If not, why did you randomly capitalize it? Why do all spam e-mails randomly capitalize words? This trend is starting to bug me.

>This may sound strange and unbelievable to you, but it is real and true.
>Being a widely traveled man, he must have been in contact with you in the
>past or simply you were nominated to him by one of his numerous friends
>abroad who wished you good. Engr. Jürge Krügger until his death was a
>member of the Helicopter Society and the Institute of Electronic &
>Electrical Engineers.

It does sound strange and unbelievable, and I doubt that it's real and true. I don't know anyone who lives abroad really (not anyone that knows me well enough to suggest that I should get so much money, when they could use it more, I'm sure). Wouldn't this random guy be more likely to leave his money to someone he knows well, instead of some random person mentioned by one of those numerous friends abroad? Why not leave this money to one of the societies or institutes he was a member of, since he obviously cared about them?

>According to him this money is to support your humanitarian activities
>and to help the poor and the needy in our society. Please if I reach you
>as I am hopeful, endeavor to get back to me as soon as possible to enable
>me conclude my job. I hope to hear from you in no distant time.

Does he know that I have any humanitarian activities? What if I need to help myself first (I have debts I'd be happy to pay off and I'd love to buy a house and furnish it first). How does he know that I'm not poor and needy? In which society am I to help the poor and needy? I'm not in any hurry to endeavor to get back to this person, who thus far has no name (nor knew my name). Good luck hearing from me, I'm not feeling any rush to be told I need to pay $XX to get "my inheritance."

>Note: You are advised to contact me by email: >addison_caroline1@yahoo.com.my

Note: I don't care about getting in contact. You're e-mail doesn't make sense.

>I await your prompt response.

Keep waiting.

>Yours in Service,

Not falling for it,

>Caroline Addison
>Partner
>Attorney at Law
>Allen & Overy LLP, UK

M.A. Smith
Housewife
blah, blah, blah
Tulsa, OK

Awkward Shyness Has Bad Timing

Lately, I've not been feeling extremely shy. That has not always been the case though. When I was really young, I was very awkwardly shy and I still am to a degree.

The bad timing on shyness is that sometimes I'll feel comfortable around people and then suddenly I'll need something that I don't feel comfortable asking for and suddenly I feel painfully shy. This is a big deal for me mentally, as I should feel comfortable asking people who I know care about me for something to make me feel more physically comfortable.

Once or twice, this popped up at the chiropractor's office. Since I only went with Ace driving me, he was my mouthpiece. Before we left, I got what I needed and felt good, but I should have been able to ask for myself. I know that no one would be mad at me, but I just couldn't bring myself to ask on my own.

I doubt my awkward shyness would manifest if I was asking for someone else (it never has before, nor does my intense dislike of calling people). I'm not quite sure what to make of it. Am I fine asking for others to be made comfortable because I'm a people pleaser? Is that same tendency why I feel bad asking for something for me? And why does it seem like the answers to these questions will just bring me more questions?

I offer no answers and make no promises. I'll attempt to get better and hopefully I'll succeed. And maybe someday, I'll fully defeat my shyness.

I Don't Think She Knows What No Contact Means

Back when I stopped talking to my mother, I gave her one simple rule. Don't contact me. She could contact Ace, but not me.

Since then, Ace has only heard from her through me. And she's sent me several cards (the first mailed to my in-laws, the rest sent with my siblings), tried to friend me on MySpace, and called me once (apparently at my sister's insistence).

While I can use that excuse for the phone call, I can't do much to excuse her for sending me cards. Cards with money in them (for Christmas and my birthday), making it harder to just refuse them.

I wanted her to just leave me alone. To let me get over my hurt and anger and to move on with my life. Instead, she keeps trying to pop up at the most random of times. In my effort to avoid her, I've cut most of my ties with my extended family (all my aunts, uncles, and cousins are on her side).

Yesterday, in the wake of what is fairly obviously her inability to let me be (I still have yet to confirm it with my sister, but it's not like I really need to), I did something I never planned on doing. I joined Facebook to connect with my extended family and be kept up to date on what is really going on.

This whole thing has been weird. Before I joined Facebook, I determined that I could make it where my mother couldn't contact me through her own name there. It's not perfect, but at least this way I know that I can connect with loved ones and feel safer about it.

But I have a couple of questions before I go. What does no contact mean to you? And if your children requested it, would you honor their wishes?

God Is Good

Last night, Ace and I were listening to a series (we're still in the middle of it, so we're still listening to it I guess) about God being good. And while this isn't a surprise, it's more meaningful right now than it would have been in the past.

Ace and I are spending more time immersing ourselves in the Bible and Biblical teachings lately. We've been reaching out to find God in a way we hadn't in a long time.

All of this is reminding us how good God is. How important we are to Him (He knows how many hairs are on my head right now, according to the Bible. That's kind of impressive, and definitely love.). How He wants good things for us.

And it's changing how I'm looking at life. I may not be where I want to be (I'd rather Ace and I have more room and preferable no one living quite as close as they are now), but I'm content that it's good, which is what God wants for me.

And because God is good, I'm willing to trust and obey what the Bible says. I'm willing to rely on the promises God made. After all, isn't that what He's really asking me to do? To trust, obey, and believe that He is willing to perform all that He has said? And if I believe the Bible is the truth, shouldn't I act on those beliefs?

Right now, I don't know what will happen later today or tomorrow (although, I have some ideas). I just know that God is good. Maybe that knowledge is enough for right now, right this minute. After all, I can't control everything, nor would I really want to.

God is good. All the time.

The Hilarity of Spam

MA's Note: This is the exact e-mail I got (I copied and pasted) yesterday. I left off the header stuff (e-mail addresses), but this was obviously not from the FBI. There was never any name listed in the e-mail and I just noticed that I was BCCed for some reason.

Anti-Terrorist and Monetary Crimes Division
Fbi Headquarters In Washington, D.C.
Federal Bureau Of Investigation
J. Edgar Hoover Building
935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW Washington, D.C. 20535-0001 Website: www.fbi.gov


ATTENTION

This is an official advice from the fbi foreign Remittance / telegraphic
dept.,it has come to our notice that the C.B.N Bank Nigeria district has
released 10,500,000.00 US dollars into bank of America in your name as the
beneficiary, by inheritance means. The C.B.N Bank Nigeria knowing fully well that they do not have Enough facilities to effect this payment from the united kingdom to your account, used what we know as a secret diplomatic transit payment (s.t.d.p) to pay this fund through wire transfer, they used this means to complete the payment.

They are still, waiting for confirmation from you on the already Transferred funds which were made in direct transfer so that they can do final crediting to your account.

Secret diplomatic payments are not made unless the funds are related to
terrorist activities why must your payment be made in secret transfer, if your transaction is legitimate, if you are not a terrorist, then why did you not receive the money directly into your account; this is a pure coded, means of payment? Records which we have had with this method of payment in the past Has always been related to terrorist acts, we do not want you to get into trouble as soon as these funds reflect in your account in the U.S.A, so it is our duty as a world wide commission to correct this little problem before this fund will be credited into your personal account. Due to the increased difficulty and unnecessary security by the American authorities when funds come from outside of Europe, and the Middle East, the f.b.i bank commission for Europe has stopped the transfer on its way to deliver payment of $10,500,000.00 to debit your reserve account and pay you through a secured diplomatic transit account (s.d.t.a). We govern
funds immediately we receive this legal documents.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
We have decided to contact you directly to acquire the proper Verifications and proof from you to show that you are the rightful person to receive this
fund,because of the amount involve, we want to make sure is a clean and legal money you are about to receive. Be informed that the fund are now in United State in your name, but right now we have ask the bank not to release the fund to anybody that comes to them, unless we ask them to do so, because we have to carry out our investigations first before releasing the fund to you. Note that the fund is in the BANK OF AMERICA right now, but we have ask them not to credit the fund to you yet, because we need a solid proof and Verifications from you before releasing the funds. So to this regards you are to re-assure and proof to us that what you are about to receive is a clean money by sending to us FBI Identification Record and also Diplomatic Immunity Seal Of Transfer(DIST) to satisfy to us that the money your about to receive is legitimate and real money.


You are to forward the documents to us immediately if you have it in your
possession, if you don’t have it let us know so that we will direct and inform you where to obtain the document and send to us so that we will ask the bank holding the funds, the Bank Of America to go ahead Crediting your account immediately. These Documents are to be issued to you from the World Local Bank that Authorized the transfer, so get back to us immediately if you don’t have the document so that we will inform you the particular place to obtain the document in United Kingdom (U.K), because we have come to realize that the fund was Authorized by (H.S.B.C) Bank in London.

An FBI Identification Record and Diplomatic Immunity Seal Of Transfer (DIST) often referred to as a Criminal History Record or Rap Sheet, is a listing of certain information taken from fingerprint submissions retained by the FBI in connection with arrests and, in some instances, federal employment, naturalization, or military service. These Condition Is Valid until 10th day of Novenmber.2009 after we shall take actions on Canceling the payment and then charge you for illegally moving funds out of Nigeria. Guarantee: funds will be released on confirmation of the document.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Final
Instruction;
1. Credit payment instruction: irrevocable credit guarantee.
2. Beneficiary has full power when validation is cleared.
3. Beneficiaries bank in U.S.A., can only release funds.
4. Upon confirmation from the world bank / united nations.
5. Bearers must clear bank protocol and validation request.
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NOTE: We have asked for the above documents to make available the most complete and up-to date records possible for the enhancement of public safety, welfare and security of Society while recognizing the importance of individual privacy rights. If you fail to provide the Documents to us, we will charge you with the FBI and take our proper action against you for not proofing to us the legitimate of the fund you are about to receive. The United States Department of Justice Order 556-73 establishes rules and regulations for the subject of an FBI Identification Record to obtain a copy of his or her own Record for review.


The FBI Criminal Justice Information Services (CJIS) Division processes these requests to check illegal activities in U.S.A. An individual may request a copy of his or her own FBI Identification Record for personal review or to challenge information on the Record. Other reasons an individual may request a copy of his or her own Identification Record may
include international adoption or to satisfy a requirement to live or work in a foreign country or receive funds from another country, i.e. Diplomatic Immunity Seal of Transfer, letter of good conduct, criminal history Background, etc.)

THANKS FOR YOUR CO-OPERATION.

ROBERT MUELLER

WASHINGTON DC
Anti-Terrorist and Monetary Crimes Division
Fbi Headquarters In Washington, D.C.
Federal Bureau Of Investigation
J. Edgar Hoover Building
935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW Washington, D.C. 20535-0001 Website: www.fbi.gov

Now to start off, does it sound like our writer speaks English as a first language? Since the e-mail's address ended with .de, I doubt he or she does. Also, they misspelled November and didn't catch it.

Second, the random capitalization is hilarious, isn't it? All rules of grammar seem to have left the building when they wrote this e-mail.

Third, FBI should always be capitalized. And the FBI only has authority in the USA. I don't know who would be coming after me if I was supposedly getting money from Nigeria, but I doubt the FBI would be the only ones involved. (Also, why would they be asking me to send them info they have access to? And why warn me they are looking at me if I am doing something wrong?)

The last thing I want to nit pick right this moment is that the name signed near the bottom of the e-mail is the name of the director of the FBI. Why would he take time out of his busy life to send me an e-mail (from a foreign country)? And why send it on a Sunday?

In short, none of this e-mail makes any sense. Why would someone fall for this? And what info were the spammers hoping for? They don't really tell me where to send anything (unless they really wanted me to send stuff to the FBI, which doesn't make any sense).

6 of One, Half a Dozen of the Other

The good news is that I still have water.

The bad news is that my water heater is, for all intents and purposes, dead.

After 5 minutes (probably less), I was informed that the water heater couldn't be fixed and needed to be replaced. 25 minutes later, the guy left after capping the line, giving me some advice on what tanks not to get, and got a check for over $100. Then I let Guillermo back in, shut the front door, and cried for a couple of minutes because this whole thing is frustrating.

And I managed to mess up some when starting my pot roast this morning, so it might not be as moist and delicious as it should be.

Can it just be June now? June seems to like me. May seems to treat me with contempt.

Does anyone want to give me a new water heater (and pay for it to be installed)?

Tonight, The Dog's Name Is Mud

Ace and I spent most of this afternoon both at home and in the living room with Guillermo. Around 9, we went to do our grocery shopping.

Guess who couldn't wait to go to the bathroom while we were gone?

Right in front of where Ace sits, there is now a spot that is being treated to get rid of any stain and any smell. Ace plans on waiting up to scrub the spot one more time, then when the spot is dry, I get to vacuum it (Ace has work tomorrow and should already be in bed).

Why would Guillermo choose the only time he's been alone in a while to do something he knows better than to do?

At least it doesn't smell as bad as it did the last time something like this happened (although, he can't claim sickness as the reason this time either).

Questions

I was looking at books on Amazon. To be more specific, I was looking at the Humor section (it's under entertainment). To my surprise, not so many flat out humorous books, but books that had some humor in them.

One of the books I came across was called "I Was a Better Mother Before I Had Kids", so I felt compelled to look into it. I read what I was allowed to read (not too much, but enough to know that I might be interested in it). Then I scrolled down to look at the other recommended books.

Why are there so many books trying to offer solutions to problems parents have with their kids? (I know... $$$) And why are so many parents turning to books to solve their problems? (I know... time)

But, I think the most important question is: Why are women still reluctant to admit that they aren't perfect all the time?

I ask because there are times I feel reluctant to admit that. Why does it seem like society at large looks down on me for admitting that I mess up from time to time? Am I blaming society for my inadequacies in dealing emotionally with mistakes and moving on?

Ace never makes me feel like I'm a terrible person because I make a mistake. But I know that I put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect all the time, something that can never happen. And the times I take that pressure off, I feel so relieved that I don't have to live to an impossible ideal (and interestingly, make fewer mistakes then).

I know that I won't find answers to most of my questions, but at least they are out there. And I'm working on myself by admitting that I'm not perfect, and that I need to remember that more often so I have less stress.

But why is this still an issue?

Who is that Man?

Ace asked me a good question once (okay, he's asked me lots of good questions, but I only want to talk about a particular question).

We were watching TV, a common habit in this household, and some ad came on with Billy Mays (Oxiclean, I think). And Ace looked over at me and asked "Who is Billy Mays? I mean, other than the guy in the commercial."

I had no idea. I still don't, but it's odd to me that he starts off every commercial he's in saying "I'm Billy Mays." It's all well and good that he's Billy Mays, but why should his endorsement entice me to buy a product when all I know is his name and that he talks in a fairly loud voice? It's not like he's Walter Cronkite (not that I remember Walter Cronkite, but he has been named the most trusted man in America. Bonus fact, he's still alive!).

Can you give me a good reason to trust Billy Mays? Or should I just keep ignoring him?

Day 2

Today was not the best day.

Today started off well. I woke up on time, I got clean and got dressed and made it to the court house on time (early enough to snag a seat on a sofa, which is much better than a seat on an uncomfortable chair). I got through several more chapters of Pride and Prejudice and wondered where I might be by the end of the day if I didn't get called upstairs.

I got to see a grown woman (with kids!) throw a hissy fit because she wasn't excused to go home even though she was excused from the case she was called up for. It was funny/scary/annoying.

Then I got called for a case. And then I got to hear what the case was about. Then I got asked questions (as did several other people who were called upstairs). And by the end of the afternoon, I was fighting off the desire to just emotionally freak out in the courtroom (I think I was fighting off a panic attack, but I'm not sure).

And when Ace and I got home, I broke down and cried. Twice.

My plan tomorrow, is to ask to be removed from that jury pool. I obviously can't handle the case emotionally. I'd rather take the chance on a different trial.

Can it just be Saturday now, please?

My Big Question of the Day

Well, it's more like my big question for dinner tomorrow night, but here it is:

Should I have Tuna Alfredo or Chicken Alfredo?

In case you're wondering, yes we like Alfredo sauce here, but that wasn't really the main reason for my question. We have a tuna Alfredo mix and a chicken Alfredo mix and since we can't have any hamburger mixes (we have no hamburger) they are the most likely thing to fix for dinner tomorrow night.

So, I welcome your input (if I had any idea how to make a quiz, I would, but I don't). Ace's suggestion was to find out which one takes less time and make that, but I'd like at least one other opinion on the matter (and I don't currently have one).

TTFN!

P.S.: I sent my resume to six potential places to work yesterday (I sent it to 8, but 2 are already ruled out). I'm waiting to hear, but it may be Monday before that happens. So busy waiting.