Thursday, October 6, 2011

Why Anonymous?

After nearly 4 and 1/2 years posting here anonymously, I figure it's time I write about why this blog is anonymous.

4 and 1/2 years ago, I had a different blog. One that was know by my family. One that was probably read by at least some of my family. It was similar in lots of ways to this blog. I talked about random stuff that was on my mind and things that were happening.

But, I found myself censoring much of what I wanted to say. I didn't want my father to read about my sex life, because we have a mutual understanding that we each pretend the other doesn't have sex and thus our mental states stay free from acknowledging that the other is human with human sexual needs. We are both happier that way. I also found myself wanting to write about stuff with my mother, but not willing to write it where either she could read it or at least our mutual family members could read it.

At some point, something happened that brought about me feeling like I couldn't write anything there. I felt stifled by my self-imposed restrictions. I felt like I needed to write posts to mentally deal with things, but I couldn't write there any more.

So, I started a new blog. I decided to be anonymous, although the veil of anonymity is fairly thin sometimes. If any one who knows what is going on in my life (at this point, mostly my in-laws) were to read this blog, they would likely know I was the one writing it (as far as I know, they have no clue about blogs and thus I am fairly safe from them). It's a place for me to figure out how I feel about things or to write about what is happening.

Even here, I limit some topics. I don't constantly whine about my in-laws, because I'd rather think about more positive things. I don't talk about politics ever, I rarely think about such things. I rarely talk about my faith because it's so personal to me and it seems like the kind of thing to protect. I only occasionally talk about sex, because it also seems like the kind of thing to protect.

I don't plan, at this point, to stop being anonymous here. Anonymity suits me for this place. It gives me more freedom to talk about various things. It's not like I'm hiding my personality, just my name.
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