Wednesday, June 20, 2012

No Answers

Last Friday, I went back to truck driving school. I needed to shake off the rust from roughly 30 days of not driving. I spent 4 days working on backing and driving. I learned a lot, and felt frustrated and sore and then on Monday successful. I felt ready to take my test on Tuesday, which was a change from the last time.

I really don't want to talk about that test yesterday. I've got another 30 days before I can test again. It wasn't that I couldn't do the backs (which is where my problems cropped up). There seemed to be some problems with the equipment I was given and I wasn't experienced enough to compensate. I'm surprisingly okay with everything.

But that's not what I wanted to talk about. That's just me updating about what's gone on while I've been away from the blog.

While I was at school, I was asked lots of questions about who Ace and I were going to work for and if he was already driving or waiting on me. I had people asking why Ace wasn't at least working a local job. I had answers for most of the questions, but not all of them. We are still trying to figure things out and some things were complicated.

People keep asking me questions. I don't have answers for them. And I'm feeling frazzled and tired. I don't know any more. Asking me what I want for dinner is kind of too much right now. I don't know and I need to not have anyone ask.

I'm feeling a bit empty. I'm not angry, I'm not particularly frustrated, I'm just mostly numb. The world can just hold onto its questions for a while. They don't need me to attempt to answer them today. Maybe I'll have some answers for them tomorrow.

But for today, let me be.

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