Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Confrontation

I dislike confrontation.

Wait, let me adjust that statement. I dislike confronting other people. I have this inner thing that just wants people to like me. Even if those people will never meet me/talk to me again.

And because of this, I let people walk all over me when I shouldn't. I don't stand up for myself as well as I should. I let, or practically beg, Ace to be the one who is sticking up me, because I know that he can take someone else's displeasure.

And I know that I need to get past this. I can't always be nothing but a people pleaser. It's not healthy. It ignores what I need. And it leads to me snapping at people I love and who I know will love me even if I get snippy with them. And that's not healthy for others.

So, I've got to find a way to confront others while still feeling like I'm not just pushing my own agenda. And I've got to remind myself that it's not just okay, but important to take care of myself. And while I somewhat know this, I don't practice it enough.

So, right here, right now, I am promising myself to stand up more for my rights. Because this will be good practice for stand up for my kids rights when they need it. That and I can't make someone else fight my battles for me forever.

I'm growing up, right here, right now. And isn't the point of life to grow?
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