Sunday, October 28, 2007

Dreams and Reminders

I know, I haven't posted in a little while. I've been trying to relax before I start seriously working (this afternoon, I have my first shift with Bath & Body Works). It's only somewhat been successful (the relaxing).

Last night, I dreamed of working today. I had a dream about the store (and the people who work there). It was odd to me, other than I have obviously given it a lot of thought lately. I think I'm just ready for a routine to be settled (that should take a week or two though, huh?).

I got some lovely birthday wishes from some of my family (okay, my dad and my aunt). My dad's e-mail was nice, he wanted to be sure that I got wished a happy birthday on my birthday (it's not his fault my e-mail was wonky all last weekend and half of last week). My aunt sent me an e-card, but she also sent a separate e-mail to say Happy Birthday kind of from the rest of the family (with a "We miss you" added to the e-mail). I know she wasn't trying to make me feel bad in any way, but part of me did. It's funny, because I know exactly why I've cut contact, get reminded any time I'm tempted to try to reestablish contact why it's a bad idea, and am ultimately the wronged party, but I feel bad because other people are being "punished" so that I can stay feeling sane. I think it would help if I wasn't so used to seeing my family several times throughout the holiday season (starting with my birthday).

On the plus side, my in-laws are staying completely out of the situation (I know they are curious, but they aren't trying to push me into having contact with my mom). I guess they figure I have good reasons for cutting off the contact and so they shouldn't try to convince me otherwise.

In other, better, news, I have the opportunity to go work part time (for a few months) for a ministry for a good paycheck. I'm hoping that I will be able to meet with the guy who is in charge tomorrow to find out if that would be a good fit for both of us. If so, I pretty much have two part time jobs through at least Christmas. After that, I'll have a better idea where things stand with regards to finances, our options, and such. So, my life is starting to somewhat quickly turn back around.

I'm going to go. I've got a few other things I'd like to look at before I have to eat, get dressed, and go to work (not necessarily in that order).

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