Thursday, January 21, 2010

Dreams I'd Rather Forget

Lately, I've been having dreams (lately being the past two nights). And they've been somewhat vivid and memorable. Except I'd like to forget them, somewhat.

I think I've hit a wall emotionally and it's coming out in my dreams. I'm yelling at my mother in my dreams again. I'm rejecting her attempts at comfort (or something). I'm trying to keep from just bawling in my dreams, for reasons I don't understand. I'm looking to Ace to save me from my emotions in my dreams, and he doesn't seem to understand me there.

This past year has taken a large toll on me. I'm even more cut off from my extended family than I was before (and I refuse to join Facebook just to reconnect with them, because I shouldn't have to). I'm feeling a bit more adrift than I ever have felt before. And my emotions are a little haywire right now.

And all of that is coming out in my dreams. And I'd like to forget it. But I don't know how.

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