Saturday, May 15, 2010

The Hilarity of Spam Part 8

The subject of this e-mail was ATTENTION YOUR AUDIENCE IS NEEDED!! The subject line alone interested me, since I know that I don't have much of an audience. But, since you were needed, how could I resist.

>Hello

Hello. I normally use punctuation after my greetings when writing someone.

>On behalf of the Trustees and Executor of the estate of Late Engr. Jürge
>Krügger. I once again try to notify you as my earlier letter was returned
>undelivered. I wish to notify you that late Engr. Jürge Krügger made you
>a beneficiary to his WILL. He left the sum of Thirty Million, One Hundred
>Thousand Dollars (USD$30, 100.000.00) to you in the Codicil and last
>testament to his WILL.

I've never heard of the Late Engr. Jürge Krügger (Is Late part of his name?). Also, your first sentence was a sentence fragment. I'm not fully sure the second sentence actually makes sense. Does WILL stand for something? If not, why did you randomly capitalize it? Why do all spam e-mails randomly capitalize words? This trend is starting to bug me.

>This may sound strange and unbelievable to you, but it is real and true.
>Being a widely traveled man, he must have been in contact with you in the
>past or simply you were nominated to him by one of his numerous friends
>abroad who wished you good. Engr. Jürge Krügger until his death was a
>member of the Helicopter Society and the Institute of Electronic &
>Electrical Engineers.

It does sound strange and unbelievable, and I doubt that it's real and true. I don't know anyone who lives abroad really (not anyone that knows me well enough to suggest that I should get so much money, when they could use it more, I'm sure). Wouldn't this random guy be more likely to leave his money to someone he knows well, instead of some random person mentioned by one of those numerous friends abroad? Why not leave this money to one of the societies or institutes he was a member of, since he obviously cared about them?

>According to him this money is to support your humanitarian activities
>and to help the poor and the needy in our society. Please if I reach you
>as I am hopeful, endeavor to get back to me as soon as possible to enable
>me conclude my job. I hope to hear from you in no distant time.

Does he know that I have any humanitarian activities? What if I need to help myself first (I have debts I'd be happy to pay off and I'd love to buy a house and furnish it first). How does he know that I'm not poor and needy? In which society am I to help the poor and needy? I'm not in any hurry to endeavor to get back to this person, who thus far has no name (nor knew my name). Good luck hearing from me, I'm not feeling any rush to be told I need to pay $XX to get "my inheritance."

>Note: You are advised to contact me by email: >addison_caroline1@yahoo.com.my

Note: I don't care about getting in contact. You're e-mail doesn't make sense.

>I await your prompt response.

Keep waiting.

>Yours in Service,

Not falling for it,

>Caroline Addison
>Partner
>Attorney at Law
>Allen & Overy LLP, UK

M.A. Smith
Housewife
blah, blah, blah
Tulsa, OK
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