Friday, May 28, 2010

Sometimes I Forget About the Big Picture

Overall, I'm more of a big picture person. I look at my life and realize how fortunate I am, how many things I've managed to accumulate over the years, how much my husband loves and cares for me, how blessed I truly am.

Occasionally, I let circumstances take over my view and forget that in general my problems are all very temporary and minor. I've never had to sleep in a car or on the street, I've never lacked clothes or clean water, I've rarely had to skip a meal, and I'm generally healthy (even with back problems). My life, despite sometimes seeming hard, is in actuality a very easy one.

When I start focusing on the things I don't like, I start feeling like I'm doing nothing but waiting. And while it's true that waiting has been a large part of my life, I'm usually doing something while I'm waiting.

Lately, I've been focused on how much I want to be moved out of my in-laws house (for many various reasons, only one of which is so Ace and I can have more sex). I've been focused on how much I want a new cell phone (I should have one in a little over a month, unless something more important comes up before then). I've been focused too much on me and my situation.

I read a lot of blogs (be patient, this part is important). I read about lots of other people's lives. I feel a little bit of their sorrows and a lot of their joy (at least, that's the plan). I get reminded about what is important in life and what isn't. Sometimes, I get reminded that my life isn't really that hard and that my complaints are silly when viewed against other people's problems.

Genuine complaints, like sleeping in the right position and waking up with a sore back, don't feel so much like whining. Complaints about having to carry a sucky cell phone for a month or two does. And while I'm normally a big picture person, sometimes I forget about the big picture because I'm focused on the small details. Maybe since I've acknowledged the problem, I can start to fix it.
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