A few hours ago, it was still Mother's Day (it's a little after 1 am, so it was only a couple of hours ago, I guess) so it's still on my mind. It was an odd day for me. My emotions have been wonky all day.
For the most part, it was a good day. Ace and I had sex, I took 2 naps (one was only about 15 minutes long), and we had a nice lunch with most of Ace's family (our sister-in-law had me laughing through lunch, a nice way to spend the day). I wished my step-mother and my mother-in-law both a happy day. I enjoyed watching Extreme Makeover: Home Edition and crying through it.
And yet, a part of me is hurting and my emotions are stretched to the limit tonight. It was a tough day. It was like being reminded that I'm not someone's mother yet, that my day wasn't supposed to be special.
Ace and I talked. We made a decision. After we have medical insurance again, we'll talk to the doctors and find out why we aren't parents yet. Ace, in his wonderful and honest way, told me that he hoped that if there is a problem, it's with him so that I won't feel guilty. It's obvious how much this man loves me, and I know he knows how much I love him.
So, that's where we are at the end of the day. A little emotionally sensitive, but we've made it through and we're going to face everything together. Right now, this minute, it may not be much, but it's enough.
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